Clark and Lois Kent
by Dennis Fielder
Summary: The story about what Clark and Lois were doing during Raven and Conner's adventures, with a few alterations.
1. Toys

Here's what that one person wanted. Geppetto.

Disclaimer: Geppetto belongs to Disney and Teen Titans and every other DC character I use belongs to Warner Brothers and their respective creators.

**Clark and Lois Kent**

Chapter 1: Toys

Kara was sitting in her bed as Clark and Lois arrived as they were watching her while her parents went out for dinner alone.

"Grandma, Grandpa, tell me a story." Kara said excitedly.

"Alright." Clark said as he pulled down a book called _Clark and Lois Kent_, and underneath, it said, "By Clark Kent and his wife Lois with illustrations by Conner Kent."

"Yay!" Kara said as she clapped. "I love that story!"

"Me too." Lois said.

"Alright," Clark said, and he began to read. "'Once upon a time, not so very long ago, there was a little wooden puppet named Conner Kent. But alas, this is not his story. This is the story of those two important but over looked characters, Clark and Lois Kent. That's us, Conner's parents." Clark then turned to Kara and smiled as she hopped on top of Lois' lap to see the pictures better. They had written this book especially for her since she kept asking what he and Lois were doing while Conner and Raven had their own adventures. "Aren't there things you ever wondered about us, like how on Earth we ended up inside a whale? But I'm getting ahead of myself. It all began in the town of Smallville on the morning I'd finished making my new toys for the season and Lois spread the word."

* * *

"They're ready!" Dick Grayson called out as he ran down the street. "The new toys are ready! Let's go!"

Raven clapped her hands and giggled as her mother picked her up.

"Come on, Dad!" Tim, Raven's friend from school called out as he quickly followed Dick.

"Slow down!" Tim's dad, Slade, called out. "I don't want you to get hurt!"

"Come on Mommy!" A girl named Terra called as she waited impatiently outside of the house. "The new toys are here!"

"Garfield, you have to get dressed first." Garfield Logan's mother said as he tried to run out into the street in his pajamas.

"Wait for me, girls!" Mrs. Anders said as she chased after her two daughters, Kory and Kom.

All the children were running out as the parents quickly tried to follow.

"How many times have I told you two not to run into the street without me?" Mrs. Anders asked sternly as she picked up her five-year-old daughter Kory, and held her seven-year-old daughter, Kom's hand.

"Now listen, son." Slade said to Tim. "Make you get to the best toys first. Make sure you're upfront, and we'll be the first in town to buy one of Kent's new toys."

"Now remember dear, we walk when we're in the street." Raven's mother, Arella, said.

"Okay." Raven said. "Then let's go on the sidewalk, so we can run Mommy!"

She wasn't only interested in Mr. and Mrs. Kent's toys. She was interested in seeing Mr. and Mrs. Kent. They were like a spare set of parents to her, especially since her father had left them when Raven was only three… Or was it two?

"Can I get a new doll house Mommy?" Kory asked Mrs. Anders eagerly. "Can I?"

"Yes dear." Mrs. Anders panted as she was having trouble holding onto Kom's hand as they were running down to the Kents' toy shop.

"_I want the model train that blows real smoke!_" Dick said with a smile as he pulled on his father, John's, arm.

"Easy son." John said.

"_I want the rocking horse with big brown eyes!_" Terra called out as she ran into her friend Garfield, and the two pulled both of their parents towards the shop.

"_You know Mr. Kent's latest, are sure to be the greatest!_" Tim said eagerly.

"_Like the flying fish that really flies!_" Kory called out as everyone arrived at the shop.

_There's toys of every shape and size!  
I don't know how much longer I can wait  
Please turn your sign to "open" dear Mr. Kent  
All spring I kept an eye out  
Now I can't wait to try out  
Each new top and boat and block and Marionette, Oh…_

All the children crowded around the window to see what was inside.

_Toys  
I see a room that is full of  
Toys  
I see a shop that is bursting with  
Toys  
Things you can pummel and pull  
I see toys you jiggle toys you juggle  
Toys you hold at night and snuggle  
Boys, or girls, whichever the case  
Need toys to put a smile on their face  
Before they lose their pieces  
Or their wheels or their shine  
Give me toys  
I love toys  
Especially when they're mine!_

Clark and Lois Kent then came out.

"Hello there." Clark said with a smile.

"Mr. and Mrs. Kent!" Raven called out as she ran up to them, and Lois picked her up.

"Raven!" Lois said with a smile. "We've been thinking about you all Spring."

"Hey Raven, what do you need for that little scene your mother says you've made in your bedroom?" Clark asked slyly.

"A unicorn." Raven said.

"A unicorn?" Lois said. "Now dear, where are we gonna find a unicorn for little Raven?"

"I don't know." Clark said. "Hey, what's that over there?"

Raven looked but didn't see anything when Clark neighed, and she turned to see a brown unicorn toy reared gracefully, and Raven smiled and took it.

"Thank you, Mr. and Mrs. Kent." Raven said as she ran back to her mother. "Mommy, Mommy, look what Mr. and Mrs. Kent gave me!"

"Yes I see, dear." Arella said. "Now, I'll just put it in my bag to keep it safe until we go home, okay."

"Okay." Raven said as she gently placed her new unicorn inside her mother's purse.

"Alright my friends," Clark said as he and Lois each grabbed a door after Clark switched the sign to open. "The Kent's is now open."

They opened the door, and all the children cheered and rushed in.

"_I want that castle with the working moat!_" Terra said.

"_I want those marching soldiers and to hold them!_" Tim said as his father smiled. "_This little wooden wagon._"

"_Ooh look, a scary dragon._" Raven said as she pointed it out to her mother.

_Climbing monkeys, dancing donkeys  
Look at all them…  
Toys  
I'm in a room that is full of  
Toys  
I'm in a shop that is bursting with  
Toys  
With things to pummel and pull  
I see toys you wiggle  
Toys you wind up  
How'll I ever make my mind up?_

"_No dear, that's much too fragile._" Terra's mom said as Terra picked up a wooden snake.

"_No dear, that's too expensive._" Slade said as Tim sighed as he looked at a model train.

"_No dear, that makes too much noise!_" Mrs. Anders said as she stopped Kory from twirling around a noise maker. "Remember Mommy's headaches."

"_No dear, you'll only break that._" John pointed out to Dick.

"_No dear, your dad could make that._" Garfield's mom pointed out as he was looking at a working train engine.

_You already have so many toys!  
Don't be greedy!_

"_Please, dear, don't start that sniveling._" Terra's mom asked as she directed her away from a giant toy gorilla.

"_Please, dear, don't throw a tantrum._" Garfield's dad said as he whined about wanting the train engine.

"_You know Mommy hates it when you whine." _ Mrs. Anders said as she held Kom's shoulders."_It's so ugly!_"

_Just say "Goodbye" and "Thank you."  
Don't make me have to spank you.  
Don't make me sorry that you're mine._

"You've really outdone yourself, Clark." Arella said as Raven was looking around for something.

"Thank you, Arella." Clark said. "As usual, everything you see is satisfaction guaranteed."

"Where's Krypto?" Raven asked.

"Oh, he's up there, dear." Lois said, and Raven rushed up to Krypto.

"Dear, don't run!" Arella called out worryingly.

_Toys! (No dear,)  
I'm in a room that is full of (That's much too fragile.)  
Toys! (No dear,)  
I'm in a shop that is bursting with (That's too expensive.)  
Toys! (That makes too much noise!)  
With things to pummel and pull (No dear, you'll only break that.) _

_I see toys you wiggle. (No dear, your dad could make that.)  
Toys you wind up. (You already have so many toys.)  
How'll I ever make my mind up? (Don't be greedy.)_

_Boys, or girls, whichever the case. (Please, dear, don't start that sniveling.)  
Need toys to put a smile on their face. (Please, dear, don't throw a tantrum.)  
Before they lose their pieces. (You know Mommy hates it when you whine.)  
Or their wheels or their shine. (It's so ugly.)  
Give me toys. (Just say "Goodbye" and "Thank you.")  
I love toys. (Don't make me have to spank you.)  
Especially when they're mine! (Don't make me sorry that you're mine.)_

Clark and Lois smiled at all the happy children but wondered why several of the parents, in fact most of the parents, in fact everyone except Arella, couldn't control their children. They guessed some people just weren't meant to be parents. They then went over to Arella and Raven. Raven was petting Krypto and talking to her mother about that art thing she was doing. Arella was an artist, and Raven wanted to be one too, as it should be.

"I want that one!" Kom suddenly called out, snapping Clark and Lois out of their wandering thoughts.

"But dear, it's all covered up." Mrs. Anders said.

"That's why I want it!" Kom said.

"Hello." Clark said. "Sorry about spacing out there."

"Just thinking about things." Lois said. "Can we help you?"

"Yes." Mrs. Anders said. "My oldest child wants whatever's under there."

"Oh sorry." Clark said. "That's not for sale."

"But I want it!" Kom shrieked.

"Don't shout, Kom Anders." Mrs. Anders said. "Mr. and Mrs. Kent said it's not for sale."

"Mom, you promised I could have any toy in this store!" Kom shouted. "You promised, you promised!"

"Sister," Kory said. "I think Mommy was talking about the toys that were for sale."

"But she promised!" Kom shouted before her mother grabbed her firmly by the shoulders.

"Now young lady, one more word, and I'm taking you home!" Mrs. Anders said sternly. "Is that what you want?"

"No." Kom said sulkily.

"Hey." Clark said. "Come here."

Clark knelt down and held out his fists.

"Pick a hand." Clark said.

"Go on, sweetie." Mrs. Anders said, and Kom begin to grin. Clark and Lois knew she liked games, and kids loved this certain little trick.

Kom touched Clark's left hand.

"I'd pick the other hand if I were you." Lois whispered sweetly.

Kom touched Clark's right hand, and he opened it up to show a small bag of candy.

"That is just for you." Clark said. "Now you can eat it when your mother says."

Kom ate it right then and there.

"Or right now." Clark said.

"Thanks." Mrs. Anders said. "And sorry about Kom acting out. She's been acting up ever since her father passed on."

"I wonder what that thing under the cover was." Kom said.

"Oh!" Kory said. "Maybe an angel had the stork lay an egg in Mrs. Kent's tummy, and they're having a baby!"

"Come on, kids." Mrs. Anders said. "Let's find a toy for both of you, and that's it. One toy each."

"Okay." Kom said.

"Yay!" Kory called out.

"Kory, use your inside voice." Mrs. Anders said.

"Oops." Kory said.

Raven and Arella then came up with Krypto.

"Can you imagine that, you guys?" Clark asked. "Parents who can't control their children?"

"Well raising children isn't as easy as it looks." Arella said kindly.

"Mommy, we're still spending the night here, right?" Raven asked.

"Yes dear." Arella said. "We'll just drop by the house first to drop of your unicorn and grab our overnight stuff.

Arella and Raven then walked off as Raven began talking to Kory about some of the books she had been reading since the last time they'd met as Lois rubbed the highest point of her husband's secret project.

"We'd never let you end up with a family like the Anders." Lois said. When it came to children, even the good ones were hard to control for them.

"_Why is it the people who shouldn't have children who have children?_" Clark asked as he rubbed the back of Krypto's ear.

"_Why is it the people who don't know how lucky they are who are blessed?_" Lois asked as she joined her husband.

"_Why is it the ones who see children as bothers are the ones who get to be fathers?_" Clark asked.

"_When someone like we, clearly would be the best._" Lois said as she wrapped her arms around Clark and looked sadly at a mirror on the other end of the shop as she thought about how she couldn't have children and was essentially robbed of what she and Clark wanted most in the world.

_There must be a slip-up in heaven's workshop  
Or a wrinkle in nature's design.  
That we spend our days  
With the children of the people who shouldn't have children,  
And none of them are mine.  
None of them will ever be mine._

Clark twirled a small apparatus he had made with a bunny, a star, and a heart on it as a kind of mobile that he'd just made as something to fill up some extra time as Garfield took a look at it.

_Look! Look! That whirl-a-gig with the thing-a-ma-jig_  
_Is a toy I never had!_  
_What is it?_  
_I don't know, but I want it really bad!_  
_Please! PLEEEEEEEEEEEEZE!_

Clark and Lois walked back down as the children and parents moved around the store.

_Toys! (No dear, (Why is it the people))  
I'm in a room that is full of (That's much too fragile. (Who shouldn't have children who have children?))  
Toys! (No dear, (Why is it the people))  
I'm in a shop that is bursting with (That's too expensive. (Who don't know how lucky they are who are blessed?))  
Toys! (That makes too much noise! (Why is it the ones who see children as bothers))  
With things to pummel and pull (No dear, you'll only break that. (Are the ones who get to be fathers?) )_

_I see toys you wiggle. (No dear, your dad could make that. (When someone like we,))  
Toys you wind up. (You already have so many toys. (Clearly would be))  
How'll I ever make my mind up? (Don't be greedy. (The best.))_

_Boys, or girls, whichever the case. (Please, dear, don't start that sniveling. (There must be a slip-up in heaven's workshop)  
Need toys to put a smile on their face. (Please, dear, don't throw a tantrum. (Or a wrinkle in nature's design.))  
Before they lose their pieces. (You know Mommy hates it when you whine. (That we spend our days))  
Or their wheels or their shine. (It's so ugly. (With the children))  
Give me toys. (Just say "Goodbye" and "Thank you."( Of the people who shouldn't have children,))  
I love toys. (Don't make me have to spank you. (And none of them are mine.))  
"Especially when they're…" _The children called out.

"_Don't make me sorry that you're…" _Their parents said at the same time.

"_And none of them are…_" Clark and Lois thought in all this confusion.

_Mine!_

"_TOYS!" _Excited children called out.

Clark and Lois sighed good naturedly and went back to work helping the children and their parents.

* * *

I'll be a sport and let you guess what's under the cover.

Kom: A great big doll!

Kory: A crib!

Terra: A frog!

Garfield: A frog?


	2. Empty Heart

Chapter Two: Empty Heart

After Raven and Arella came back and put their overnight stuff upstairs, things began to settle down in the shop. Most of the parents and their children began to make compromises about what they could and couldn't have, and Mrs. Anders was the last to leave as Kory begged to play with Krypto.

"Well, thanks again for everything Mr. Kent." Mrs. Anders said. "You really out did yourself."

"It was no trouble." Clark said. "Thanks for stopping by."

"Thank you for the candy Mr. Kent." Kom said. She seemed to be more of an afternoon/evening person.

"Yes, and thanks for letting me play with Krypto." Kory said. "See you at school in a few days, Raven."

"Bye Kory." Raven said.

"Good night, Mr. Kent!" Tim called out from half-way home.

Clark then changed the sign to "closed".

"_None of them will ever be mine._" Clark sung to himself.

He then looked around the room with Lois as Arella and Raven helped clean up. Which meant Arella helped sweep up, and Raven kept Krypto busy as he liked playing with brooms. After that, Raven walked up to the covered toy Kom wanted.

"What's under here, Mr. Kent?" Raven asked.

"To be honest, I'm glad you asked." Clark said. "This is a little something I made for Lois and me."

Clark then pulled the cover off to reveal a little wooden boy that looked a lot like Clark except with larger eyes, like Lois'.

"This is Conner Kent." Clark said, and Raven looked at him. "I bet if he was real, you two, Kory, and Tim would get along great and have played with all of you and the toys."

"He doesn't have a mouth." Raven pointed out.

"That's because Clark hasn't painted it on yet, silly." Lois said with a smile.

"Which I am about to do right now." Clark said as he painted a line between Conner's wooden lips and colored the lips in a bit. "Perfect."

"You know what I wish?" Lois asked. "I wish Conner was a real boy, and we were his parents."

"Me too." Clark said. "Heh, listen to us talk."

Clark then picked up the puppet control for Conner, and he stood up.

"He's your finest creation, Clark." Arella said.

Clark smiled, and he had Conner kneel down as a thank you.

"Oh, you're welcome." Arella said. "Your father's certainly done a good job of raising you."

"You guys are the silly ones." Raven said with a laugh as she shook Conner's wooden hand. "Hello."

"Well, my boy, I'm going to set you down here and let you dry." Clark said.

"Mommy, can I stay down here to keep Conner company?" Raven asked.

"Sure dear." Arella said. "Now let's see, I brought your nightgown, bathroom stuff for the morning, and of course, Bunny."

"Yay!" Raven said as she yawned.

"Not a moment too soon." Arella said. "Come on Raven, go to the bathroom and change while I set up a bed for you."

After Raven did that, she arrived in a long white nightgown, and she settled on the couch her mother had temporarily made into a bed.

"How about some music to help you and Conner go to sleep?" Clark asked as he wound up one of his many music boxes.

"Besides, it's way too quiet in here." Lois added.

Clark then set the box down and opened it as it played a song, and Raven almost immediately fell asleep to its soothing tones.

"You two have big hearts." Arella said before she moved upstairs.

Clark sighed.

_I know our hearts are large._

_That's why they feel so empty._

Clark then turned off the lights and walked upstairs with Lois.

_If we could have just one wish come true,_

_We'd be to fill these empty hearts…_

They opened the door to their room as Krypto ran in, and Arella slept in the guest room, Clark's room when he was a boy.

"_I fill my days with work._" Clark said with a sigh.

"_We fill our nights with dreaming._" Lois added.

_And wait in hopes of a someone who,_

_And fill these empty hearts!_

_Like an open shell on the shore,_

_Like a riverbed dry of all water._

_Nothing's growing here anymore._

_Is it too late for life to start?_

They both changed into their pajamas and looked out at the night sky, with a star Clark's father told him about, the wishing star, shining overhead.

_On such a magic night,_

_When all the world is shining…_

_Our foolish prayer, may it travel far._

_We even wish it on the wishing star…_

_To fill these empty… hearts._

They then went to sleep, dreamt of a version of the day with a living Conner Kent playing with all the children and helping out with Raven and Arella.

()()()()()

Had they known it, at the moment they fell asleep, a glittering light flew in and traveled downstairs. As it did this, the whole house shook slightly, and Clark and Lois awoke with a start.

()()()()()

"What?" Clark asked.

"What's going on?" Lois asked. "Who's there?"

They met up with Arella at the beginning of the stairs, and they each had something to fight the apparent intruder with. Clark held a coat rack, Lois held a chair, and Arella held a baseball bat she'd found in Clark's old room.

They then saw an angel in a long, bare-armed, blue dress. She had hawk-like wings and red hair with green eyes. Raven was starring at the angel and Conner imbetween the two as she looked excited and fearful at the same time.

"Now remember, be a good boy." The angel said. "And always let your conscience be your guide. Prove yourself brave, truthful, and unselfish, and someday you'll be a real boy."

"What in the heck's going on?" Lois asked in shock as the angel turned to them.

"For what good is a real set of parents without a real boy to come home to?" The angel said as she smiled at them.

"What?" Clark asked.

"Clark and Lois Kent, you two have brought so much happiness to others; you deserve to have your wish come true." The angel explained.

"This is so cool." Raven said as Arella gently pulled Raven out of the way between the angel and Conner.

"Little puppet," The angel said as she pulled out a long glowing sword. "To make these people's wish come true, I grant the gift of life to you."

A shower of sparks shot from her sword and landed on Conner, and he turned around and climbed down from the table as everyone's jaws dropped in shock, except Raven who clapped and giggled.

"But you're a puppet." Lois gasped as she and Clark walked over to Conner.

"I'm not a puppet, I'm Conner Kent!" Conner said excitedly.

"May both your hearts be full." The angel said with a small laugh as she disappeared.

"Hey wait…" Clark said as she disappeared, and he looked down at Conner who was looking at them.

"Conner?" Clark asked. "But you're made of wood."

"I know." Conner said. "But someday when I'm good and brave, the angel, Shayera, will make me a real boy!"

"I don't believe this!" Clark said excitedly as they both hugged Conner. "Our very own son."

"Oh, come to Mommy, sweetie!" Lois said as she hugged and kissed Conner all over.

"Mommy, Mommy guess what!" Raven called out as she tugged on Arella's nightgown.

"What dear?" Arella asked.

"Shayera made me Conner's conscience." Raven said.

"Well I'm sure you'll make a very good one." Arella said with a smile.

"I don't know how this happened," Clark called out. "But thank you, Shayera… Or whoever you are!"

They then got ready to go back to bed as Conner slept in Clark and Lois' bed with them.

"Tomorrow, you can move into my old room." Clark said as he set Conner between himself and Lois.

"Why?" Conner asked.

"Oh every little boy needs a room of his own." Lois explained.

"Why?" Conner asked.

"Oh to go when he wants to be by himself and think, or to where he can go when his parents have people there who are really boring." Clark answered.

"Oh." Conner said. "Good night, Mom and Dad."

"Good night son." Clark said.

"Good night dear." Lois said as they were about to went to sleep when Conner asked another question.

"Can I play with the toys tomorrow?" Conner asked.

"Yes, tomorrow." Clark said. "Right now it's time for sleep."

"Okay." Conner said before he asked another question. "Can you read me a story."

"Tomorrow." Lois said. "We sleep tonight."

"Okay." Conner said. "Can I ask you one more question?"

"Alright, if you go to sleep afterwards." Lois groaned.

"Okay." Conner said. "How'd you two meet?"

"We'll tell you that as your story tomorrow, now please dear, go to sleep!" Lois whined.

"Okay." Conner said. "Mom, Dad."

"What?" They both asked.

"I love you." Conner said before he went to sleep and they both kissed his forehead.

"We love you too, son." Clark said with a smile.

"So very, very much." Lois added.

* * *

Aw…

Conner: Doug.

Me: What?

Conner: How come I'm Pinocchio?

Me: Because I thought you fit the character.

Conner: Okay. (Pause) Doug?

Me: What?

Conner: How do I fit the character?

Me: Because you both weren't actually born and were just made.

Conner: Okay. Good night.


	3. Clark, Lois, and Son

Chapter 3: Clark, Lois, and Son

"Alright, so we didn't sleep so well." Clark said as Kara was giggling at Conner's questions. "Who cared? We had a son unique in the entire world."

"After all," Lois went on. "It's not every little boy who can trace his family tree to a tree."

* * *

Clark and Lois walked out of the shop to show Conner around the town.

"Clark, come on and hurry up!" Clark called back with a smile. "It's a beautiful day!"

"Coming Mom and Dad!" Conner shouted as he walked quickly out followed by Raven and Arella.

"We can't wait for everyone in town to meet you." Clark said. "'Why Mr. Kent, what a fine looking boy you have.'"

Clark then shook Conner's hand as he smiled.

"'And he's so good looking and well behaved too.'" Lois added with a smile as Conner laughed.

"Alright, Conner." Clark said. "It's you, me, and your mother now. From now on, we're a team."

He then looked at a store owned by his and Lois' friends, Bruce, Diana, and their son, Terry called "Bruce, Diana, and Son", and Clark pointed it out.

_See the words on the sign in that window._

_Those are words I have envied for years._

_But today we're no longer jealous over them._

_What our friends can say, finally we can say…_

The three then crossed the street, followed quickly by Raven and Arella.

_And son._

_That's the addendum _

_That always should end a pair's name._

_And son._

_Now when we say it or proudly display it,_

_It's done by Clark, Lois, and son._

They then walked to the store as Bruce and Diana walked out while Terry was making sure a reign was properly set up.

"Bruce, Diana!" Clark called out.

"Hey guys." Bruce said as he appeared. "What do we have here?"

"This is our son, Conner." Lois said.

"Your son?" Diana asked with a smile. "Well that definitely makes him your finest work."

"Conner, this is Mr. Bruce Wayne, his wife Diana, and their son Terry." Clark said.

"Hello." Conner said with a smile.

"Nice to meet you Conner." Bruce said.

"Such a good looking boy." Diana said. "I'm guessing he was modeled after you, Clark."

"Nice to meet you, Conner." Terry said as he shook Conner's hand and exclaimed. "Ah, splinter."

"I'm sorry." Conner said.

"No problem." Terry said as he easily pulled the splinter out and tossed it in the garbage. "I'm sure that won't always happen; knock on wood, if you'll pardon the expression."

"You must be very proud." Diana said.

"Oh we are." Lois said. "You know, I don't mean to brag, but you should see some of the adorable things he does."

"Pardon me, Lois." Bruce said with a smile. "But I hope they don't include that."

"What?" Lois asked as she looked and saw Conner in a bundle of clothes from the semester shop next door as Raven giggled.

"Hi Mom." Conner said. "Hi Dad."

"Uh, Conner." Clark said as he pulled Conner out of the cloth. "That's not something you should do."

"Why?" Conner asked.

"Because those are meant to be sold to other people." Clark explained.

"Oh." Conner said. "Can I do it in my room?"

"What, lie on a bunch of cloth?" Lois asked.

"Yeah." Conner said.

"Sure, just fix up your bed afterwards." Lois said with a smile.

"Okay." Conner said.

"Let's go meet some of the kids your own age." Clark said as he guided Conner off.

_You belong with me._

_Sing the song with me…_

_And son._

_That's the addendum,_

_That always should end a pair's name._

Clark and Conner then clapped their hands and walked around each other as a sort of new secret handshake.

"Cool." Raven said.

_And son._

_Just like the garden,_

_We bask, if you pardon the pun,_

_In Clark, Lois-_

"_And son!_" Conner called out as he was standing in wet cement.

"Oh dear!" Lois said as she pulled Conner out. "Conner, get out of there! You're not supposed to walk in wet cement! Now these people have to do their job over!"

"Oops." Conner said in a voice that would have been accompanied by blushing if Conner had any blood. "I'm sorry."

"Well," Clark said with a half-smile. "We made quite an impression today."

He was sure that the next day would go better.

The next morning, Conner ran outside.

"Hurry up, Mom and Dad!" Conner called out. "I wanna play with Raven, Tim, and Kory!"

"Conner, get back in here!" Lois called out. "You're supposed to pick up your toys and put them away when you're done paying for them!"

"Conner?" Clark asked as he stepped out. "Son? Where are you?"

Conner then walked out with a tricycle Clark had made and hid the previous night after Conner had gone to sleep.

"What's this, Dad?" Conner asked.

"Oh, son." Clark said. "That was going to be a surprise."

"Oh, I'm sorry." Conner said. "What's a surprise?"

"Just a present a parent or a friend gives for no other reason than they want to." Clark said. "Well, it's not like you were expecting it. This is a tricycle."

"What's it for?" Conner asked.

"Hop on, and I'll show you." Clark said as Conner got on. "Now peddle."

"Huh?" Conner asked.

"Oh sorry." Clark said. "That means put your feet on the pedals and move your legs."

Conner did so and smiled as the tricycle moved.

"See?" Clark asked.

"Uh-huh!" Conner said excitedly.

"_It's a wonderful day for these parents._" Clark said as Lois arrived and sighed as she smiled at her son and husband.

"_It's a wonderful day for their boy._" Conner added.

_To be sharing activities properly planned._

"For this dad at last." Clark said with a smile.

"For this lad at last!" Conner said as he rode off down an alley.

"Wait son, no!" Clark said. "That's a one way-"

There was a loud smack.

"Street."

Kory and Tim ran in with Raven.

"He is okay!" Kory called out.

"Phew." Clark and Lois said as they went in and came back with Conner beside them as Clark held the tricycle. It was easily repairable. He only dented the joint a little and the wheel had come loose. Clark remembered his own days on his first tricycle and didn't complain while Lois was hiding her face from some of the laughing people, which included Mrs. Anders and Slade.

_And son._

_Life isn't spent_

'_Till you've made things parental your aim._

"_It's grand, son._" Clark said as he put the tricycle in his work area in the shop.

_Who else could laugh as much?_

_Having half as much fun,_

_As Clark, Lois, and son?_

Conner then put his toys away after Lois told him to for the third time, and he then spent the rest of the day drawing a weird S-like symbol.

The next day began with the rooster crowing as usual when Lois came out, her hair frazzled from lack of sleep.

"QUIET!" Lois shouted before slamming the door shut.

"What's wrong with Mom?" Conner asked as he got up from his sketching. He was now drawing Krypto with the S-shape attached to his collar.

"Oh, she gets cranky when she doesn't get a good sleep." Clark explained as he put Conner's newly fixed tricycle outside. "Alright son, today we're gonna stay inside. It's time you learned how to be a toy-maker."

"But I don't wanna be a toy maker." Conner said. "I wanna draw and design stuff."

"No you don't." Clark said with a smile. "You've got toy-making in your bones. My father made toys, and his father, and generations back."

"Hey, tell you what." Lois said as she calmed down. "How about, your dad gives you a toy-making lesson, and you can spend the rest of the day drawing anything you'd like?"

"That sounds fair." Conner said.

"Of course." Clark said. "Besides, if you don't make toys with me, how are we gonna call our shop Clark, Lois, _And son?_"

Conner looked at his drawing at put it down.

"Come on, sing with me." Clark said with a smile.

_And son._

_Two words that promise_

_The quality put-out's the same._

"Now today we'll start off easy and sand this part for the wing."

"It doesn't look like a wing." Conner said.

"It will once you're done with it." Clark said with a smile, and Conner began sanding it.

_And son._

_Says my technique will_

_Be passed to my sequel._

_It's under the care of someone,_

He then gently corrected how Conner was sanding the wing.

_Who's grown up to be…_

_Exactly like me._

_No we're not just Clark and Lois._

_We are Clark, Lois, and son._

_No we're not just Clark and Lois._

_We are Clark, Lois, and son!_

"I'm done!" Conner said as he held out a very good wing for his first try.

"Not bad." Clark said. "Next time, don't be afraid to let it get curved a bit more, but very good."

Conner then went to his picture and drew a line before handing it to his parents.

"What do you think?" Conner asked.

"Whoa!" Lois said. "That's amazing. Why's Krypto flying?"

"Because he's Superdog!" Conner said excitedly.

"I think you went a little weird on the s." Lois commented.

"No, I made look cooler for his collar." Conner said.

"Whoa." Clark said. "Well, that is impressive. Oh, by the way, you're starting school tomorrow."

"Why?" Conner asked.

"So you can learn to read and write." Lois said. "It's a great way to get smart."

"Okay." Conner said. "Can I show my drawing to Krypto?"

"I'm not sure he'd understand what it means." Lois said.

"Oh…" Conner said.

Krypto then hopped on top of Conner and licked him.

"Krypto, no!" Lois said. "Bad dog! What if you licked off his mouth?"

"On' 'oie', 'O'!" Conner said.

"Oh my gosh!" Lois screamed before she looked and saw Conner laughing. "That wasn't funny young man!"

She then glared angrily at Clark as he smirked a little while he worked on the Pegasus he was making. Lois couldn't wait for school tomorrow.

* * *

Well… Wasn't that a nice phew days.

Lois: Shut up!


	4. Just Because It's Magic

Chapter 4: Just Because It's Magic

The next morning, Lois managed to get enough sleep to get herself back to normal, though she was still very tired, this was mostly due to Krypto wanting to go into Conner's room to sleep on his bed, so Lois had to have him sit downstairs, which became more difficult every time. When the alarm clock rang, she touched it and figured she could just catch a few extra winks after seeing Conner off. Clark woke up too, but he had slept mildly better than her as Conner came in already dressed.

"Come on Mom and Dad, it's time for me to go to school." Conner said. "Did you two have a good night? I slept like a log."

"Sweetie, you pretty much are a log." Lois yawned good-naturedly. "Go draw something while Mommy and Daddy get ready like a good boy, okay."

"Okay." Conner said as Krypto barked happily and played with Conner, who laughed and played with him, but Lois just held her head.

"Well, we better get dressed." Clark said.

"You dress; I'm going back to bed." Lois said. "I've barely had any sleep in the past few days and… Why won't Conner behave?"

"Dear, it's not like he's doing something any of the other boys wouldn't do." Clark said.

"At _three_." Lois countered.

"Relax." Clark said. "I'm sure he'll be fine."

Soon afterwards, the two went out with Conner.

"How will I know what to do in school?" Conner asked.

"Just act like all the other children, and you'll be fine." Clark said.

"Act like all the other children." Conner repeated. "Got it."

"I know you're gonna make us proud, son." Clark said.

"Now give us a kiss." Lois said as she bent down, and Conner kissed his cheek. "That was good, now off you go."

Conner then joined Raven as they ran off.

"Now I can get some sleep." Lois sighed as she and Clark both fell on different chairs and passed out.

()()()()()

An hour or two later, they were awoken when Tim and Kory came in.

"Mr. and Mrs. Kent!" They called. "Mr. and Mrs. Kent!"

"What?" Clark asked.

"Miss Bertinelli said to come get you!" Kory said.

"There's a big fight at school!" Tim added.

"And you need to come with us!" Kory finished.

"Whoa, slow down, why do we have to come with you?" Clark asked.

"Conner is in trouble!" Kory said.

"You need to come to school right away!" Tim explained.

They rushed to school, but their way was blocked by a bald man with a ventriloquist puppet on his left hand.

"Come one, come all, to Lex Luthor's Amazing Marionette Show!" The man, Lex Luthor, called out. "The spectacle of a lifetime! A masterpiece of entertainment! Come see the show everyone's talking about! See marionettes dance and sing!"

Only one person in every twenty that were passing picked one, and Clark guessed he wasn't very good. Clark and Lois had to pass him to try and get to the school, and he stopped them.

"Hey, what beautiful children you have." Luthor said.

"They're not ours." Clark said.

"Then what beautiful children you borrowed." Luthor amended. "You know what they'd love? Lex Luthor's Amazing Marionette Show! This is my biggest star right here. 'Hey kiddos!'" He had the puppet talk while he was moving his lips which supported what the children said as they watched. He was awful.

"Sorry, we don't have time." Clark said as the kids went into the school yard.

"Well maybe next time." Lex said before they heard him say, "How do you expect to sell tickets if you sing off key?"

"That guy's awful." Kory said. "We went to his show once to check it out, and Kom begged to leave."

"My dad uses it as a threat to get me to clean my room." Tim said.

"Later kids." Lois said. As she and Clark saw Conner wrestling with a boy while the teacher, Helena Bertinelli, was trying to get them to stop, as Raven tried to pull them apart too, but got pushed back by Red. After that she was shouting for Conner to beat the snot out of him.

Once Clark and Lois made it within reach distance, they pulled Conner back as Miss Bertinelli held the boy.

"Conner what are you doing?" Clark asked. "You stop that! What's going on, here?"

"To put it frankly, he's been fighting Mr. Kent." Miss Bertinelli said as she kept a firm hold on the boy as he squirmed to get loose and continue the fight while Conner tried to do the same. "I don't know what you two have taught him at home, but maybe you should have added that fighting isn't allowed at school."

"But Miss-" Lois began.

"You'll have to take your son home." Miss Bertinelli continued.

"Home?" Clark asked. "He just got here."

"This kind of behavior will just not be tolerated." Miss Bertinelli said. "This isn't like simple rough housing where it's a more for fun and exercise, this was practically a brawl."

"Come on." Lois said. "This is Conner's first day at school, and I'm sure you've noticed that he's a little different from all the other children."

"I understand that he's made of pine." Miss Bertinelli said.

"Actually," Clark put in. "He's made of birch. You see pine scratches to easily, and-"

"Honey, now's not the time." Lois said.

"Even wooden boys have to follow the rules!" Miss Bertinelli said.

"Wait, Miss Bertinelli, is that a new hairdo?" Clark said quickly.

"Well actually yes." Miss Bertinelli said. "Thanks for noticing."

"It's very flattering." Lois said.

"Why thank you." Miss Bertinelli said.

"Now, what seems to be the problem here?" Clark asked.

"Well, Conner has been imitating all the other children, and it created quite a stir." Miss Bertinelli said.

"Is this true, Conner?" Clark asked.

"Yes!" The boy said. "Everything I did, he-"

Before Conner interrupted with, "Yes! Everything I did, he-"

"See?" The boy asked.

"See?" Conner copied.

"Son, stop that." Clark said.

"But you told me to act just like the other children and do just what they did." Conner said.

"We know." Clark said. "But we didn't mean completely imitate them. I think you owe this boy and Miss Bertinelli an apology."

"But I was just doing-" Conner began before Clark interrupted.

"I don't want to hear it!" Clark said. "No excuses. Just apologize."

"I'm sorry." Conner said.

"There, now was that so hard?" Clark asked. "Now that that's taken care of, Miss Bertinelli, we'll be off."

"Not so fast, Mr. and Mrs. Kent." Miss Bertinelli said. "I believe we still have the matter of taking your son home."

"Alright." Clark sighed.

"One work of warning Mr. and Mrs. Kent." Miss Bertinelli said. "Be careful. Boys like that end up on Pleasure Island."

As they walked off, Conner turned to Clark and Lois.

"What's Pleasure Island?" He asked.

"Never mind that." Clark said. "Your mother and I are very disappointed in you, Conner."

"But I was just doing what you told-" Conner began before Lois cut him off this time.

"Your father already told you no excuses, Young Man." Lois said.

Both were beginning to crack now. Conner was acting like a little baby that you had to tell everything to step for step, and the incident at school was beginning to break the camel's back. They then had to walk past Luthor again.

"Ah, my friends." Luthor said. "Another borrowed child?"

"This one's ours." Clark said.

"Well since it appears you'll have a free afternoon," Luthor said before he got a good look at Conner's face. "Why don't you come… see . . . my show?"

"Not today." Clark said. "Come on, Conner."

"Conner." Luthor said. "What a nice wooden boy. Excuse me, sir."

"Not now!" Clark said.

"It's about your little boy, Kyle." Luthor said.

"It's Conner!" Lois said.

"Oh right." Luthor said. "You know I'm always on the lookout for young talent and I couldn't help noticing-"

"No!" Clark and Lois said at the same time. Conner may not be as good a boy as they'd like, but they sure as heck weren't going to let him be exploited. "Conner's not interested."

"Not interested in what?" Conner asked.

"Do you like to sing and dance, my boy?" Luthor asked.

"Yup." Conner said.

"He's not your boy!" Clark said. "Come on, Conner."

They walked off.

"Conner did your father and I tell you not to talk to strangers?" Lois asked.

"No." Conner said.

"Well we're telling you now." Clark said. "Don't talk to strangers."

()()()()()

Lex watched Conner's parents take them to a nearby house called, "The Kents", and he smirked.

"You thinking what I'm thinking?" Lex asked the puppet version of himself in his arms before he had it turn its head and say, "'Do I have a choice?'"

"Good point." Lex smirked.

()()()()()

"I have never been so embarrassed in all my life!" Lois said angrily as they entered the shop. "All you had to do was go to school and sit quietly until the bell rang, now how hard is that?"

"But I didn't mean to do anything wrong!" Conner whined.

"I know." Clark said. "But you have to use some common sense. Now sit on this chair until supper and think about what you did and how you made the boy you were fighting with feel."

Clark then set Conner down on a chair. Conner then began to cry, and Clark looked down sadly. Maybe he was being too hard on him.

"Hey son, you don't have to cry." Clark said. "Everyone makes mistakes."

Clark looked at Conner's face and bent down.

"Hey, I got a trick I wanna show you." Clark said. "Pick a hand."

"I don't wanna pick a hand." Conner said tearfully.

Clark then opened his hand and figured he should just go for the direct approach.

"Look son, that's for you." Clark said.

"I DON'T WANT IT!" Conner shouted as he slapped the hand away.

"Fine!" Clark shouted back. He'd had enough of this. "If you want to cry than you can just go to your room, but no trains, no games, nothing!"

Conner then stomped upstairs as Krypto whimpered.

"Wow." Lois said. "Dear, I know it hurt when Conner said he didn't want to be a toy-maker yesterday, but on top of all the other stuff that's happened, don't you think we're being too hard on him?"

Suddenly there was a loud crash as Conner shouted in fear.

"What now?" Clark asked rhetorically.

They arrived to see Conner kneeling over a ruined music box.

"Oh no." Clark said.

"I didn't do anything!" Conner said quickly. It just fell! The window was open and this big wind came and-"

His nose grew about three inches.

"Alright, son." Clark said. "Tell the truth, what happened?"

"I am telling the truth!" Conner insisted, and his nose grew another three inches.

"What's going on?" Conner asked.

"Well they say when a little boy lies, his nose grows." Lois said.

"Now tell the truth." Clark said.

"I… I was mad, so I kicked the dresser, and the music box fell." Conner said, and his nose returned to normal.

"Well now I guess I actually do have to tell you exactly what to do." Clark said as he grabbed Conner by the arm and put him on the bed. "You are going to sit her until either supper time or I say so, and you're not to move an inch!"

"I bet Mr. Lex Luthor wouldn't shout at his son!" Conner shouted as Clark left.

"Fine, then go life with Lex Luthor!" Clark shouted as he walked down and slammed the door.

Clark didn't know what to do. Conner acted up in school; he acted as if the whole town was a big park for him to play in, and he had to practically bribe Conner just to learn how to make toys. He figured he'd have to talk to that angel Shayera.

"Watch Conner, I'm going out." Clark said.

"Alright." Lois said.

()()()()()

Conner heard Clark's voice outside and walked out to the window to see his father walking away.

"Shayera." Clark asked in a whisper that Conner was able to hear. "Come on, we need to talk. Conner, he's a big disappointment. He's not what Lois and I had in mind at all. Shayera! Where on Earth do you find an angel when you need one?"

Conner heard this, and it just about broke his heart. His dad, and possibly his mother too, didn't want him. He had tried his best to be good and do what they said, but all he did was make them mad at him. He sat back on his bed and cried.

()()()()()

"Sweetie!" Lois called out. "I'm going to grab some things for dinner, okay?"

Conner didn't answer. She remembered her first punishment and figured he'd get over it as soon as it was supper time.

"I'll see you later." Lois said as she walked to the grocers.

()()()()()

It was night as Clark was walking across a bridge to the town.

"Hello?" Clark called out. "You there? Ollie! Ollie! Angel free! Hey look, fifty dollars in angel money. I can't use it. Oh, come on, where are you? Oh, this is getting just plain stupid."

Clark sat down just as Shayera appeared.

"Hey Clark Kent." Shayera said as she appeared. "You don't have to thank me for giving you your wish; you and your wife deserve it."

"Look, about that wish." Clark said. "I think it might be defective."

"Eh?" Shayera asked.

"You know, damaged, not quite right." Clark said.

"You know, buddy, you're pretty impatient." Shayera said. "We often don't see the path we're taking until we've taken it."

"Look, no offense, but isn't it possible you made a mistake?" Clark asked.

"Nuh-uh." Shayera said. "My friend Paran makes mistakes. My brother-in-law, loads of mistakes. But I don't ever make mistakes."

Shayera then shot several sparks at Clark's shirt from her sword, and Clark felt like he'd been punched.

"Look, we're two adults here." Clark said.

"Honey, I knew you when you were in diapers." Shayera countered.

"Maybe, but look, I just want you to make things right." Clark said.

"Didn't you ever think that it wasn't Conner who was being defective?" Shayera asked.

"He doesn't know anything!" Clark said. "He doesn't follow the rules, and he shows no interest in being a toy-maker. If that isn't defective, I don't know what is!"

"Well I guess you don't then." Shayera said.

Shayera then pointed her sword at Clark, and he ended up being forced to sit down by some outside voice.

"Oh boy." He muttered.

_Everybody now a days,_

_Is looking for a quick fix._

_Everybody moans and pains_

_For a magic fix it._

"_Cast your spell."_

"_Wave your sword."_

"_Make my wish come true."_

_But they seldom look beyond,_

_To then what will they do._

_They don't have a clue._

_Like you._

Shayera then sat down next to Clark.

_Just because it's magic,_

_Doesn't mean it's easy._

_Just because it's magic,_

_Doesn't mean your life is solved._

_When you get the thing for which you yearned,_

_Then you find the yearning has returned._

_Happy is the man who finally learns,_

_Happy endings must be earned._

Shayera then lifted her sword, and Clark felt himself being pulled up like a puppet and found himself dancing with Shayera.

_Just because it's magic,_

_Doesn't mean contentment._

_Even with enchantment,_

_There are bound to be some flaws._

"_Why can't it be perfect now?" You sigh._

_Honey, I'll be glad to tell you why._

_It takes more than magic._

_Why? Just because._

Clark then found himself and Shayera dancing like they were in some musical.

"You're not gonna fix this, are you?" Clark asked.

"Clark, honey, we don't fix what's not broken." Shayera said.

_Just because it's magic, (Oh beautiful angel,)_

_Doesn't mean it's easy. (With the loveliest pair of wings.)_

_Just because it's magic, (Please grant me this favor.)_

_Doesn't mean your life is solved. (Just a couple of tiny things.)_

"_Don't take this as ingratitude._" Clark said as they began to dance. "_But you really have an attitude._ _And my Conner is proof that you can goof._"

_Just because it's magic, (So beautiful angel,)_

_Doesn't mean contentment. (It's time to remedy,)_

_Even with enchantment, (Simply compel him,)_

_There are bound to be some flaws.(To do as we tell him.)_

"_Why can't it be perfect now?" You sigh. (And want to grow up like me.)_

_Honey, I'll be glad to tell you why. (Start listening.)_

_It takes more than magic. (Start listening!)_

_Why? Just because. (You're a very arbitrary fairy.)_

_You need more than magic._

_Just because._

_Just because…_

Shayera then began to disappear.

"Wait!" Clark called out.

"Farewell, Clark." Shayera said as more sparks fell on Clark's clothes. "If you or your wife ever need me, just have your heart call to me."

"Why?" Clark asked. "So you can ruin another shirt?"

She vanished.


	5. Bravo Lex Luthor

Chapter Five: Bravo Lex Luthor

Kara was starring at her grandfather confusedly.

"Why did you think that Miss Shayera goofed?" Kara asked.

"Because I had asked for a little boy who could talk, and I wasn't expecting the talking back part. Most of the way home I kept thinking about how everyone was carrying on about the Kents and their sawdust for brains son, and I was ready to try and prove that I wasn't about to let my family become the laughing stock of Smallville. I figured that if Shayera wouldn't fix Conner, I'd have to do it myself."

* * *

Clark arrived home. As he arrived he figured he _had_ been too hard. He was only four days old after all, technically. He'd just have to set him down and talk to him for a little bit and be careful of what he said until Conner got the hang of things. He ran into Lois who carried several bags.

"Conner?" Clark called out. "Son, you can come down now."

"Conner, I'm about to make supper." Lois said.

"Conner?" Clark asked as he went upstairs. "Son, we need to talk about a few things."

Clark and Lois both went into Conner's room and looked around.

"Conner?" Clark asked.

Clark looked at the bed and picked up a letter.

"What's it say?" Lois asked.

"'Dear Mom and Dad, I know I've been a big disappointment to you. While you and Mom were gone, Lex Luthor came over and told me he'd make me a big star in his show, so I've gone to live with him.'"

Clark smiled as Lois began to look around frantically while Clark just casually walked around.

"Alright, Conner." Clark said. "Joke's over. You can come out now."

Clark then opened the closet.

"Got you!" He said before looking around. "No I don't."

"Conner?" Lois asked. "Honey, if this was a joke it's stopped being funny to the only person with your sense of humor."

"Come on, Conner." Clark said as he looked under the bed and Krypto came up whining as they both starred at the letter, and Lois put her hands over her mouth. She then sat on the bed and looked at a teddy bear they'd given Conner to sleep with when he had trouble doing it on his second night.

"Lex Luthor?" Clark asked as he looked at the letter. "Maybe it's for the best."

_Maybe this letter,_

_Means things will be better,_

_For both of us._

_We've got,_

_Our old tried and true life._

_And you've got a new life,_

_As Lex Luthor and… Son . . ._

"I don't care if he does become a big star." Lois said as he picked up Conner's teddy bear. "He may not want us as parents anymore, but I know my little boy well enough to know that, Kent or Luthor, he'll never sleep without this."

"Right." Clark said. "Plus it'll give us a chance to say good-bye."

Suddenly, they heard knocking on the door.

"Hello?" Arella called out.

They went down and found Arella there.

"What's up?" Clark asked.

"Have either of you seen Raven?" Arella asked.

"No." Lois said.

"She went over here to try and cheer Conner up about what happened and explain what figures of speech were." Arella said.

"Wow, she's taking this conscience stuff really seriously." Lois said.

"I know." Arella said. "But that was over an hour ago. Oh no, where could she be?"

"I think I know." Clark said. "She probably went after Conner when he left to join Lex Luthor's show. We'll find her since we're going that way too."

Krypto barked and came along.

()()()()()

They found several large tents in the fields that bordered Smallville and a large forest. Clark, Lois, and Arella went in to find Conner singing between two puppets.

_I've got no strings to hold me down._

_To make me fret or make me frown._

_I had strings, but now I'm free._

_There are no strings on me._

_Hi-ho, the-me-ri-o!_

_That's the only way to be._

_I want the world to know,_

_Nothing ever worries me._

_I've got no strings, so I can play._

_Unlike the other puppets hung all day._

_They've got strings, but now I'm free._

_There are no strings on me._

Everyone cheered as Luthor appeared.

"Ladies and gentlemen, our newest star!" Luthor called out. "You know him! You love him! The extraordinary Superboy, the puppet without strings!"

"Superboy?" Arella asked.

"I think it's catchy." Clark said.

"I think the word is corny." Lois added.

"Good night, and don't forget to tell your friends!" Luthor said as he and Conner walked off the stage.

They waited until the people, who apparently thought Conner was Luthor's own son in puppet make up, left. Clark and Lois looked at the teddy bear she was holding. The talk of someone else as Conner's father tore the pair apart inside.

()()()()()

"998," Luthor counted. "999. Would you like the honor of saying it?" Luthor held a gold piece to Alexander, his puppet self. "'1,000!'"

"We really cleaned up my little Superboy." Lex said with a smirk. "You should be proud, very proud."

"Yes but-" Conner began, but Lex interrupted.

"Just think, a thousand pieces of gold for every town in Kansas… Heck, in America!"

"Mr. Luthor!" Conner called out from the cage Lex had put him in.

"You are going to be the biggest star this side of the Pacific Ocean, what do you think of that?" Lex asked.

"Can I come out, now?" Conner asked.

"Come out?" Lex asked. "Oh, no, no, no my dear stingless puppet. It's a dark and evil world, and we must lock up our valuables lest someone steal them."

Lex then picked up a role of parchment.

"And of course, there's the little matter of the contract you signed!" Lex said.

"But I don't wanna stay here!" Conner shouted. "I wanna come out!"

"YOU'LL DO AS YOUR TOLD!" Lex shouted back, and Conner backed away in fear.

"Mr. Luthor?" A voice asked, and Lex looked up. If anyone found him treating Conner like this, he'd be in big trouble.

"One moment, please." Mr. Luthor called out. He then pulled Conner out of the tent, not noticing a small five-year-old girl in a white leotard and cloak hiding from him.

"What are you doing?" Conner asked as Luthor then put a cover over him.

"Not a word out of you, or you'll regret it faster than you can say kindling!" Lex said as he walked inside.

()()()()()

"Don't worry Conner, I'll get you out!" Raven said as she pulled on the bars of Conner's cage as Conner pushed, and they gave before Conner ran off towards the forest. "Wait, home's the other way!"

()()()()()

After hiding Conner, Lex opened the door as the couple he recognized as Conner's parents came in with a pure white dog and a woman in a white cloak.

"Are we disturbing you?" Clark asked.

"Not at all." Lex said. "Not at all. Uh… We met before, right? Mr. and Mrs. …"

"Kent." Clark said.

"Mr. and Mrs. Kent!" Lex said. "Pleased to meet you. Very nice name."

"I guess so." Clark said. "We're to give Conner his teddy bear. He can't sleep without it."

"Who?" Lex asked.

"Conner." Lois said. "You called him Superboy."

"You know." Clark said. "_Got no strings to hold me down._"

"Oh Conner!" Lex said as he quickly made up a lie. "You just missed him."

"Missed him?" Clark asked. "How can that be? Isn't he living with you?"

"Living with me?" Lex said in surprise. "Oh, no, no, no. This was a one night engagement. Little Conner left right after the show. He said something about this town being too small for him and seeking his fortune in Metropolis."

"You let a little boy go all the way to Metropolis, on foot, by himself?" Lois asked.

"Yup." Lex said.

"Arella, hold this!" Lois said before she dived at Lex, and the other two had to hold her back. "LET ME AT HIM! I WILL KILL HIM! I'LL KILL HIM AND DROWN HIM!"

"Easy, Lois." Clark said calmly. "Easy. Luthor, do you at least know where Conner went?"

"Yeah he went… Through the forest route." Lex said as he pointed out the not very large but winding forest trail. "If you hurry, you might catch him."

"We most certainly will hurry!" Lois said.

"Oh, and Raven's out there trying to convince Conner to come home." Arella said.

"Look, Arella, you go home and relax." Clark said. "We'll find the kids and bring them back. Thanks for the help."

Clark, Lois, and Krypto then hurried quickly down the forest trail.

"Good luck… Mr. and Mrs. Kent." Lex said with a smirk as he quickly went back to where he'd left Conner. "Oh Conner, we better get our things together my little goldmine! We've gotta get out of here before your parents-"

When Lex pushed the cage in and pulled off the cover, Conner was gone.

"What the-?" Lex asked. "How did-? Where's he-?"

He then grabbed a spy glass and managed to see Conner running off, followed by a little girl with gray skin and a white outfit as he rushed to a carriage, and as he got in, Lex looked at the sign and saw that it read, **"Pleasure Island"**. The girl had hopped on the back.

"Pleasure Island?" Lex called out. "Doesn't he know what they do to boys on Pleasure Island? He'll be ruined!"

He quickly walked back inside.

"We have to pack up and find him!" Lex called out. "How could this have happened?" He then turned to Alexander. "You!" Lex said angrily. "You were supposed to be watching him! 'I… I only closed my eyes for a second.' How could you do this to me? Don't you know what this means?"

Lex then threw Alexander down.

"After all I've done for you." Lex said. "Clothed you. Fed you. Kept you nice and sanded! 'I'm glad that new puppet's gone!'" Lex said in a colder more monotone version of his voice. "Who said that? 'I did you big dummy.'"

Lex then went behind a chest and picked up a green puppet with purple clothes and three circles on its forehead.

"Oh, it's you, Brainiac." Lex said. "You used to be my star attraction. Now look at you. Hiding behind a trunk in shame and disgrace. 'I can make a comeback. You don't need Conner.' You are you kidding? You're all washed up! Don't just sit around! We have to find Conner before his father does, or we'll all be out on the street!"

_After years with a second rate act_

_On a second class circuit,_

_After years of obscurity,_

_Toiling in doubt and in debt,_

_Comes the chance to perk up my luck,_

_And I'm going to perk it._

_Think of the rapture,_

_Once we recapture,_

_That marvelous marionette._

He then began putting several of his puppets away as he prepared to close up the shop.

_Remember the audience cheering the puppet who's stringless!_

_Remember them throwing those purses of gold all away!_

_It's clear a performance without him is going to bring less!_

_We've got to find him!_

_Catch him and bind him!_

_And cage him again,_

_Until we put him on stage again._

_As they say…_

"_Hooray!"_

"_Bravo Lex Luthor!" (Bravo!)_

"_Bravo Lex Luthor!" (Maestro!)_

"_Bravo Lex Luthor!_

_You are a trooper!_

_You are a showman!_

_Second to no man!_

_And with tickets selling so quickly,_

_It's making us antsy,_

_For if we can't see_

_Mr. Lex Luthor and his marvelous show,_

_There's going to be,_

_Lex Luthor Bravisimo!"_

Lex's eyes then widen as he realized something horrible.

_But what if we never can find our dear little dolly? (Oh!)_

_Farewell to my riches and the oh admiring throngs. (No!)_

_I will not allow my good fortune to be taken from me!_

_We'll search for Conner Kent_

_From here and to Tibet,_

_And bring him back where he belongs!_

He then smirked as he pocketed the contract he'd had Conner sign.

_Perhaps Little Conner's forgotten that he signed a contract!_

_That binds him to me in each consonant, rive and clause!_

_Ensuring that whenever my orchestra strikes up their entr'acte,_

_He'll be appearing, and I'll be hearing,_

_The jingle of coins, and the jangling sound of applause!_

"_Bravo Lex Luthor! (Bravo!)_

_Bravo Lex Luthor! (Magnifico!)_

_We made a theater,_

_Just for Lex Luthor._

_We who are lowly,_

_Think of you solely._

_I can't wait to say Bravo!"_

_After all of the years,_

_All of the tears,_

_Hearing the jeers,_

_Ring in my ears,_

_Silence the stoppers!_

_Fill out the toppers!_

_Weighing the offers_

_Everyone proffers!_

_They're dying to pack it with such a spectacular show!_

_They will and they are…!_

_Acclaim and uproar!_

_Lex Luthor… __Bra… Bravo. . .!_

_We go!_

Lex then walked out with Alexander. He was going to find that wooden brat if it was the last thing he did.

* * *

Uh-oh, this isn't good.


	6. The Great John Stewart

Chapter 6: The Great John Stewart

"Boy did we mess things up with Conner." Lois said. "You would've thought your grandfather and I were the ones made of wooden heads."

"Did you get inside Monstro yet?" Kara asked.

"Not yet." Clark said. "Now, it was already morning when we began to search for Conner and Raven."

* * *

"Conner!" Clark called out. "Raven!"

"We should have never let him out of our sight." Lois said more to herself, though Clark still heard it.

"Conner's gotta be around here somewhere along with Raven." Clark called out.

"Okay and when we find them can we rest and sit down?" Lois asked. "Right now a part of me wishes that you'd made a chair instead of a kid."

"Funny." Clark said in a voice that didn't sound like he thought it was funny at all.

"What else can possibly go wrong?" Lois asked when Shayera appeared.

"Oh no." Clark said.

"So there you two are." Shayera said. "Come to your senses and seen the error of your ways yet?"

"Error?" Clark said.

"Yup." Shayera said. "You're responsible for what you've created."

"Hey, this isn't about us, it's about Conner." Clark said. "If he'd shown the slightest interest in being a toy-maker, none of this would've happened."

"I'm even surer it wouldn't have happened if he behaved a bit more." Lois said. "Why can't he just be a perfect little boy who does what we say and doesn't… Step in wet cement and run into walls."

"Oh, I see." Shayera said.

"Besides," Clark said. "What's wrong with wanting a child to grow up like me or Lois?"

"Because you're such a prize?" Shayera asked cockily.

"Well we're not talking to you two are such a prize?" Shayera asked.

"Well we're not talking to you anymore." Lois said as they walked off.

As they walked off, Shayera followed, and Clark and Lois began dancing with each other.

"Oh not this again!" Clark said.

_Just because it's magic,_

_If you disregard it,_

_Doesn't mean it's tragic,_

_But it's merely prophesized._

"We can't hear you!" Clark said as he and Lois ran off as Shayera watched.

_Now I know I shouldn't intercede,_

_Still it's very obvious you need,_

_Just a bit more magic._

Shayera then shot two long trails of light from her sword and smiled. Clark wanted to know what was wrong with a child ending up as his respective parent, he'd know, and Lois would know what was wrong with a child naturally behaving and being perfect.

()()()()()

Clark and Lois soon found themselves passing a group of people going the other way as an African-American man with a mustache and goatee was tied up and hanging upside down.

"No wait, don't go!" The man said. "Please come back! I'll wrestle a tiger next!"

One of the spectators threw a cabbage at the man.

"Thanks, I needed that." The man said as Clark and Lois ran up.

"Are you okay?" Clark asked.

"Fine." The man said. "Pay no attention to the people who were leaving. Welcome to John Stewart V's Magic Show! You've just arrived in time to see the Great John Stewart escape from his bonds!"

He continued to struggle.

"Oh really?" Lois asked. "Doesn't look like you're escaping."

"This trick was started by my father, John Stewart IV." John said. "He taught it to me when I was but a small boy."

"How long have you been hanging up there?" Clark asked.

"Oh, not long." John said as he looked at his watch. "Only about six hours."

"Six hours?" Clark asked in shock.

"Oh wait." John said. "I'm upside down. Nine hours."

"Let me get you down." Clark said as he grabbed the rope and untied it as John fell down and stood right back up.

"Ta-da!" John said, and Clark and Lois shrugged and politely applauded.

"Great." Clark said halfheartedly. "Good luck with all this stuff, but I've gotta go."

"Wait, wait." John said. "And now, for the miraculous Box of Fire!"

"I don't like the sound of that." Lois mumbled as she and Clark ended up sitting on a bench.

"Now observe." John said as he showed Lois and Clark an unimpressive plastic box. "This box is completely empty. "Now, fire shall erupt from this box! Echilo!"

John waved his hand, and Clark saw a powder land on a tree next to the bench as it caught fire.

"Whoa!" Lois said.

"No need to be afraid." John said quickly as he poured a basin of water on the shrub to put out the fire. "The Amazing Shrub of Fire!"

"What was the box for?" Clark asked.

"My next trick." John said. "This time, flames will erupt from this box… Please. Echilo!"

This time the powder landed on the bench, and Clark helped Lois up as she clutched at Clark.

"Oh, no need to stand." John said nervously as he poured another basin of water on it. "It's just the amazing Bench of Fire!"

"Look we have to go." Clark said.

"No please, I have another trick!" John said.

"That's why we're going." Lois said as she looked at her slightly scorched skirt.

"Please, one more trick." John said.

"Alright, one more." Clark said as he and Lois sat down. "No more fire through."

"Don't worry, this is a trick invented by my grandfather, John Stewart I." John said as he handed Clark a rabbit. "Please examine the bunny."

"Wow, this is really good work." Clark said as he looked at the toy bunny's details. It was as good as anything he'd ever come up with. "Where'd you get this?"

"I made it." John said. "Now hold the bunny in front of you and lift it a little higher."

Clark did so, and John pulled out a bow and arrow.

"Hey wait!" Clark called out.

"Don't worry." John said. "The Great John Stewart never misses."

"Put the bow and arrow down before I become a widow!" Lois said as she shoved John's hands down.

"Look John," Clark said. "I'd hate to tell you this, but you're the worst magician I've ever seen in my whole life."

"Which is sad when I think of my sister's magician phase." Lois said. "Oh, that poor bunny."

"Anyway," Clark said. "Why are you doing this?"

"I've asked myself the same question every day." John said. "And I guess it's because my dad wants me to."

"Just because your father wants you to be a magician doesn't mean you have to be one." Clark said.

"The Stewarts have always been magicians." John said. "It's my destiny. Besides, I can't do anything else."

"What about all those wonderful toys you've made?" Clark asked as he walked to a table full of toys.

"Well I am proud of them." John said.

"_Toys." _Clark said. "_You have a talent it seems for_ t_oys."_

"Really?" John asked. "_Because I've always loved making them. Toys. I get ideas in my dreams. I make toys you line up, toys you link up, toys no buddy else can think up._"

"Then you should be a toy-maker." Clark said.

"Oh, if only I could." John said.

_Boys_

_Ought to be able to pursue their_

_Joys._

"_No matter what… Their dads do…_" Clark said as he remembered how just a few days ago he began pushing Conner into becoming a toy-maker when he said he wanted to draw.

"But mine would be so disappointed in me." John sighed. "You have no idea how much pressure a father can put on his son."

"Actually I do." Clark said as Lois rubbed his shoulder.

_Especially when… He's mine…_

"Hey, how about I saw you in half?" John asked.

"No thanks." Lois said quickly. "That's what happened to the bunny."

"Look, good luck with everything John, but we've gotta get going." Clark said as he shook John's hand and left with Lois.

"Thanks." John said.

()()()()()

As Clark and Lois left, John turned to Shayera as she appeared.

"How do you think I did, dear?" John asked.

"Well I can certainly see why I married you." Shayera said with a coy smile.

"Well, it's my job to guide Clark." John said as his clothes turned green. "I am his guardian angel after all.

* * *

Hooray, Clark's learned his lesson!

Shayera: And who's to thank for that?

Little Raven: Doug?

Shayera: No.

Little Raven: Disney?

Shayera: No.

Little Raven: Superman?


	7. Satisfaction Guaranteed

Chapter Seven: Satisfaction Guaranteed

"And that's how I accepted that Conner didn't have to be a toy-maker." Clark said.

"Yay!" Kara called out as she tossed her hands in the air and accidentally dropped her stuffed lion Mr. Fuzzy. She tried to get out of bed to get it, but Lois picked it up and handed it to her. "Thank you."

"Anyway, after leaving John to pursue his destiny of burning down the forest, Lois and I came upon a remarkable town called Idealia. We went in hoping someone there had seen Conner."

* * *

Clark and Lois walked around Idealia.

"Huh." Clark said as he and Lois looked around. Practically everyone had a child and practically everyone wore white.

"You can play with my new horse and wagon now." One boy said.

"Oh thank you." The boy's friend said.

"It's fun to share." The first boy said.

"Mother!" A little girl called out. "I'm going to go chance into some other clothes, so that I don't ruin this beautiful dress you made me."

"Darling, would you mind stopping at the vegetable stand and picking up some carrots?" A woman asked her daughter.

"Actually Mother, I already planted an entire crop of carrots behind the house." The woman's daughter said.

They then saw a family listening to a boy of about five playing the violin.

"This is how children should be." Lois said.

"I think it's kinda weird." Clark said so only Lois would hear.

They then came upon a man of about forty playing catch with his son.

"Have you seen a lost little boy around here?" Clark asked.

"A lost little boy?" The man asked. "Impossible."

"You see our son ran away-" Clark explained, and the man gasped as he tossed the ball a little too far, but the child went to get it without whining.

"Ran away?" The man asked in surprise, as if that never happened before. "My friends, have been to see Professor Hamilton?"

"No." Clark said. "That name doesn't ring any bells."

"Well you must." The man said. "He'll make things right."

"Excuse me." The man's son said as he rushed up.

"Yes Lorenzo?" Lorenzo's father asked.

"I promised Mother I'd help her prepare the liver and the spinach, and Grandpa's going to tell me a story again." Lorenzo said calmly and politely. "May I please be excused from playing?"

"Of course you may." Lorenzo's father said as Lois gaped. A little boy who asked permission to _stop_ playing? She figured on Conner's _first night_ she'd have to tell him when playtime was over.

"The children here are so well behaved." Lois said in awe. "It's amazing."

"Thanks to Professor Hamilton." Lorenzo's father said. "In fact, my friends are off to see him right now. Barda? Scott?"

He directed Clark and Lois to a couple. Both had black hair and blue eyes, and the man was dressed in a red shirt with green pants, and the woman was dressed in a red dress with a golden head band.

"Could you take these two with you to Professor Hamilton?" Lorenzo's father asked. "They're looking for a little boy."

"You are?" Barda asked with a wide smile. "Oh that's wonderful. We're looking for a little girl. The professor's a genius!"

They then both dragged Clark and Lois off as Krypto quickly followed. They arrived and were greeted by a boy of about twelve in a lab coat and glasses.

"Barda, Scott, I'm so glad to see you." The boy said.

"That's the professor?" Clark asked.

"No silly." Barda said. "That's his son."

"Who are your friends?" The professor's son asked.

"These are Mr. and Mrs. Kent." Scott said eagerly.

"Welcome come on it." The professor's son said as they went in and saw a large machine that did, who knew what? "Mr. and Mrs. Kent, may I introduce to you a man so far ahead of his time that he may actually be from tomorrow. A man I am proud to call my father. Professor Emil Hamilton!"

Professor Hamilton then emerged from behind the machine.

"Welcome, welcome." Hamilton said. "Welcome guests new and old. We just need a few more things to decide, and we'll be all set to go."

Hamilton then turned to Clark and Lois.

"Come to help out with the decision, eh?" Hamilton asked.

"Actually, we're looking for a little boy-" Clark began, but Hamilton interrupted.

"Excellent!" Hamilton said before he turned to Scott and Barda. "You get a discount for the referral."

He then turned back to Clark and Lois and bowed.

"I am at your service." Hamilton said.

"Well you see he ran away." Lois started.

"Ran away?" Hamilton said in shock before he pulled the two aside. "Oh my reputation! You didn't get him here, did you?"

"Here?" Clark asked. "What are you talking about? I carved him out of wood and an angel named Shayera brought him to life-"

"Oh, you made him yourself?" Hamilton asked relieved.

"Yeah…" Clark said as Lois was trying to figure out what was going on.

"Don't worry you two." Hamilton said. "He made him himself."

Scott and Barda sighed with relief.

"Since you two seem to be kindred spirits, I'll let you in on a secret." Hamilton whispered to the two. "You can never trust an angel to get things right. Too many variables."

"What are you talking about?" Lois asked.

"What am I talking about?" Hamilton said with a smile. "Junior!"

"He's talking about our new and improved, fantastic, scientific, remarkable, child making machine!" Junior said as he stood on a small platform.

"You make children?" Clark asked in shock.

"Not just any children." Hamilton said. "Perfect children."

"Perfect children?" Clark asked. If they had met just yesterday, he'd have asked for this professor to fix Conner, he'd admit it, but after talking with John he wasn't willing to have a child that he couldn't learn from and couldn't learn from him. Lois knew this, but she was more wondering how a perfect baby would pop out of that thing. Come to think of it, she hadn't seen a child under five since they arrived.

"Wouldn't you want to have children the-" Lois said, but Hamilton answered before she could finish.

"We used to make children to old fashioned way." Hamilton said. "It was too unpredictable."

"You never knew what you were going to get." Scott said.

"People had boys when they wanted girls." Barda added.

"Children would misbehave." Scott went on.

"Sometimes they would even run away." Hamilton finished.

"Well-" Clark said before Hamilton cut him off.

"This way, there's nothing left to chance." Hamilton said. "Junior?"

"Ready to go." Junior said. "I just need a few more inputs."

"So have you made your final decisions?" Hamilton asked as he grabbed a notebook.

"This has been really hard for us." Scott said.

"We've really agonized." Barda added.

"Anything you want my little Amazon?" Scott asked.

"Okay." Barda said. "We were thinking blonde."

"Ooh, blonde." Hamilton said with a smile. "Eyes?"

"Blue." Scott said. "Just like Barda's."

"Blue." Hamilton said. "She's gonna come out as quite a cutie. Disposition?"

"Perky." Barda finished.

"Perky, just as it should be." Hamilton finished. "One perky, blue-eyed blonde, Junior!"

"Got it!" Junior said as he pulled a switch and out came a blue-eyed blonde girl that had to be eight years old.

"Hello Mother." The girl said as she waved robotically. "Hello Father. It's a pleasure to meet you both."

Lois gasped as Clark's mouth fell open, and his eyes nearly bugged right out of his head and through his glasses. This was so… wrong. She looked nice and sweet, but what about a baby that needed his or her mother and father to survive? Someone to wash, dress, and put to sleep? Someone who needed to know what to do and how to behave. She then looked at Conner's teddy bear in her hands. Her little boy was out there somewhere. If she had remembered that he was still technically only a few days old, this wouldn't have happened. They'd be home right now admiring one of Conner's drawings with Lois' hair all frizzled from Krypto yelping to be let into Conner's room, and Lois explaining why people needed to eat right. Her attention was suddenly caught when the new girl began to sing.

_I'll be Papa's little princess._

_I'll be Mama's little pal._

_Oh, I love you both to pieces._

_What you say to do I shall._

_I love cooking._

_I love sowing._

_Dusting when I get the chance,_

_But like every little blonde girl,_

_What I do the best is dance…_

The girl then did a pirouette right to her new parents.

"She's perfect!" Barda said excitedly.

"Of course!" Hamilton said. "Of course. After all…"

_Satisfaction guaranteed._

_Satisfaction guaranteed._

_See me, Professor Hamilton_

_For a better way to breed._

_Buy my artificial child,_

_And you'll be certain to succeed,_

_As a parent guaranteed!_

"Now for you." Hamilton said. "I'll give you a good deal, inventor to inventor. "You'll have a new little… What was your boy's name?"

"Conner." Clark said.

"You'll have a new little Conner before you can say Jiminy Cricket." Hamilton explained. "But this time, one that works."

Lois and Clark were both insulted by that comment. Nothing was wrong with Conner. He was just a little naïve that was all.

"Let the magic begin!" Hamilton called out as this time, he pulled a switch, and a blonde boy popped out.

"Mommy!" The boy called out. "Daddy!"

_Can I be your little sonny?_

_Hug Dad's leg and call him, Pop?_

_Can I be exactly like ya,_

_And play catch until I drop?_

He then tossed up a ball that Clark caught reflexively as he looked like he saw a ghost, and Lois had to admit, things were getting a little creepy now.

"Isn't he precious?" Hamilton asked.

"Well…" Clark stammered. "I…"

"I understand." Hamilton said. "Something handmade. Junior?"

"Ready." Junior said as he pulled a switch, and a boy with Conner's hair came out, but beyond that, he looked more like an older version of the first boy.

"Mommy!" He called out. "Daddy!"

_Can I be your new Conner Kent?_

_See I look a little wooden._

_But I'll never disobey you._

_You're my parents, so I couldn't._

"Mm…" Krypto moaned as he hid behind Clark and Lois.

"Honey, I'm scared." Lois whispered.

"Easy dear." Clark said. "We'll just wait for the right moment and then get the heck out of here."

_Satisfaction guaranteed!_

_Have a child you pays you heed._

_From a smart-mouthed kid,_

_With individuality, you're freed!_

_Teach him any fool opinion._

_Teach him any crackpot creed._

_No despairing, guaranteed!_

Clark and Lois clutched at each other. Children weren't meant to become satisfaction guaranteed. They were supposed to make mistakes, to mess up, to learn from those mistakes. Lois then gulped. She wanted her little boy back more than ever, to hug him, to tell him that he wasn't in trouble anymore. She wanted her baby back.

"These are all very nice." Clark said kindly. "But Conner-"

"Oh forget about that old one." Hamilton said. "We're talking perfection here. Oh wait! I've got it! How about little girl? That's it!"

Hamilton pulled the switch, and a blonde girl about Raven's age came out.

"Mommy! Daddy!" The little girl said as she jumped into Clark's arms.

"Wow, that girl has strong legs." Junior commented.

"No additional charge." Hamilton said in a tone of someone selling a car.

"Well, they're just not-" Lois was about to say before Hamilton interrupted her again.

"I couldn't agree more." Hamilton said. "Wait a moment, I've got it! Twins!"

He and Junior both flipped a switch, and two girls came out.

"Mommy!" One girl called out.

"Daddy!" The other girl called out as well.

They then somersaulted over.

"Two for the price of one." Hamilton said.

"Uh…" Clark and Lois both gaped as Krypto continued to hide behind them.

"A tough sell, eh?" Hamilton asked. "Well I like a challenge."

_That's how you give enforcement._

_You require an endorsement._

_Why rely on hints and rumors?_

_Ask my satisfied consumers._

They then went outside.

"Gina!" Hamilton called out. "Luca! How are the little ones?"

"They're the best things that ever happened to us." The mother of two blonde fraternal twins said. "Lira?"

The girl somersaulted away like a professional circus performer.

"Edward?" The father asked.

"Watch this, Professor!" The boy said as he somersaulted off.

"See you later, Professor." The couple said as they somersaulted away too.

"Ah Professor!" A man in a straw hat said with a son.

"How's little Carlo Jr.?" Hamilton asked.

"Carlo Jr." The man's son said. "C-A-R-L-O J-R."

"A world class speller." The man said.

"Fantastic." Hamilton said. He then went to an African American woman with a set of triplets in the exact same dress. "How are the girls?"

"Wonderful." The woman said. "Girls?"

"Hello." They all said one at a time before saying in unison, "We're tired. May we go to bed now?"

"Of course." The woman said. The three girls then went off after curtsying to the party.

"You see?" Hamilton asked.

_Why be saddled with a daughter who's a whiner?_

_Must you suffer with a son who is a brat? (No!)_

_Bring them back for an adjustment, it's quite minor._

_Turn the dial._

_Wait awhile._

_Zap and that is that. (Zap and that is that!)_

By this point, Clark and Lois guessed that most of the parents there began as one of Hamilton's created children as they appeared to be moving in the same way as the children.

"You see?" Hamilton asked. "Aren't they a miracle?"

Clark and Lois tried to get away, but Hamilton and his son grabbed them and pushed them forward.

"Wait a second." Hamilton said. "The children are this way."

_Satisfaction guaranteed._

_Satisfaction guaranteed._

_Each a perfect progeny._

_And each one pedigreed._

"_I love painting walls and fences._" One boy said.

"_I love memorizing tenses._" One girl said.

"_I love knitting Dad a sweater._" Another girl said.

"_I'm a champion pirouetter._" Yet another girl said.

"_I add fractions in my head_." The boy who was playing the violin earlier said.

"_Come and watch me make my bed!_" A ten-year-old girl called out.

_And they do it all so cutely,_

_We can promise absolutely,_

_Satisfaction guaranteed!_

_Satisfaction guaranteed!_

_Grab a child who will fill_

_Your every parental need!_

_They say build a better mouse trap,_

_Watch the customers stampede!_

_Don't be shy now,_

_If you buy now,_

_With the usual apparatus,_

_Just for you, we throw in grates._

"A set of steak knives!" Hamilton called out.

_It's satisfaction guaranteed!_

_By one and all agreed!_

_Satisfaction Guaranteed!_

As they sung out this last part, Clark, Lois, and Krypto ran for it and managed to get out.

"Oh, I don't care if Conner steps in every block of wet cement for three months!" Lois cried out. "I just want my son back!"

"Me too." Clark said as, if they had noticed, the whole town disappeared in a shower of blue and green sparks.

* * *

Hooray! Now both of them have learned their lessons!

Lois: Lessons?

Doug: Uh-oh.


	8. Pleasure Island

Chapter Eight: Pleasure Island

"What self-respecting parent would want a perfect kid?" Lois asked as they rushed off. "I mean, besides us, a few days ago."

"Well what did we know then?" Clark sighed. All either of them cared about was finding Conner. He may be imperfect, but he was their son, and they'd made terrible mistakes from… Maybe day three at least… Unfortunately, as far as they knew, Conner was a thousand miles away.

()()()()()

The carriage Conner had gotten into rolled along.

"Pleasure Island?" Conner asked. "Is that where we're going? It sounds cool!"

Raven, meanwhile, was clinging to the back of the carriage for dear life.

"I want my mommy!" She whimpered.

()()()()()

Clark and Lois rushed in the opposite direction they saw a carriage going as they figured it was for Idealia. They then walked on with, they had to admit, the feeling that Shayera had been right. It had been their fault Conner had run away. But this trip still wasn't about them, it was about finding and apologizing to their son and bringing him home.

Shayera then appeared.

"Whoa, whoa, whoa, wait a minute!" Shayera said as she stopped them.

"Oh no." Clark groaned.

"You two have anything you want to say to me?" Shayera asked.

"Yes, good-bye." Lois said.

"Well, didn't you learn anything from the people you've seen out here?" Shayera asked.

"Yes, alright!" Lois shouted. "Yes, Conner doesn't have to be the best-behaved, or grow up to be a toy-maker, but this still isn't about us! This is about us finding our son!"

"Do you have children?" Clark asked.

"What?" Shayera asked.

"You know, children." Clark said. "Little winged toddlers flying around."

"Well I've been kinda busy in the wish-granting department." Shayera said.

"I rest my case." Clark said. "Now if you'll excuse me, we need to find our son."

"Oh boy." Shayera groaned as she flew after them.

_Certain people seem to lack_

_A certain introspection._

_Racing like two maniacs,_

_In the wrong direction._

"Wrong direction?" Clark asked. "But Luthor told us…"

_Oh dear._

_For someone as obtuse as you,_

_I'll have to engineer_

_Something extra clear._

_Look here…_

Shayera pointed her sword at a rock, and it showed Luthor standing there with that weird puppet.

"We have to find Conner before it's too late!"" Luthor said. "'Too late for what?'" He had the puppet say before he answered, "You know what happens to little boys on Pleasure Island. You don't want me to find him do you? Well this time, I'll chain him so tight he'll never escape, and you'll be nothing more than fire wood!"

The scene dissolved as Clark and Lois stared.

"He lied to us!" Clark said angrily.

"I know." Shayera said as she rested by a tree.

"That dirty, rotten-" Lois said. "When we get to Pleasure Island, I'm gonna kick his butt!"

"Right." Clark said. "You wouldn't know which way it is, would you?"

"That way." Shayera said as she pointed with her sword, and the two ran off.

_Boy you two are such stubborn dopes._

_I'm not really holding any hopes._

_Even with my magic._

_But we'll see…_

_We'll see…_

_We'll see . . ._

()()()()()_  
_

Conner walked into Pleasure Island, and one of the first things he saw was a man in a gray shirt and black jeans, a black jacket, and a red hood on his head. He turned to Conner and stared at him.

_Shouldn't there be a place where nothing is naughty?_

_Shouldn't there be a place where anything goes?_

_Shouldn't can't, doesn't, mustn't, and ought evaporate,_

_And fun's the only buis?_

_Guess what, there is!_

The man then removed his hood to reveal a young man of about twenty with a dark green mask over the area of his eyes.

_Pleasure Island!_

_Pleasure Island!_

_It's that what's for supper?_

_Candy, cake, and pie land!_

_See that window, why not break it?_

_See that toy there, well just take it!_

_And you'll never have a lesson or a chore to do!_

_Rules and limits, kiss good-bye lad!_

_Pleasure Island welcomes you!_

Clark and Lois snuck in with Krypto as they saw Conner standing next to a young man who was talking to him. It looked like a fair, and the busiest attraction was the roller coaster.

_Wouldn't you like to play and party forever?_

_Wouldn't you like to fight, and frolic, and fuss?_

_To stomp, get dirty, and never apologize._

_Is that your sort of thing? Than sing with us!_

_Pleasure Island!_

_Pleasure Island!_

_It's that what's for supper?_

_Candy, cake, and pie land!_

_See that window, let's go break it?_

_See that toy there, we'll just take it!_

'_Cause we think it's really smart when you act really dumb!_

_Schools and bedtime, kiss good-bye lad!_

_Pleasure Island here we come!_

"Come on guys!" Clark and Lois heard Conner say as he ran off with three other boys.

"Conner!" Clark said urgently as they saw Raven come up and grab Conner's arm.

"Conner no!" Raven said. "My mommy told me that this is a bad place. Also, what about your mommy and daddy!"

Conner got a hurt look on his face and pushed Raven down, so that she skinned her knee on the ground as she cried.

"Oh Raven, are you okay?" Lois asked.

"He pushed me!" Raven cried. "And I got a scrapped knee! Conner's a big meanie! I don't like him anymore!"

"Shh." Clark said as he picked her up, and Krypto licked Raven's knee. "I'm sure Conner's just going through a lot. We came to take both of you home."

"Yay!" Raven called out.

In the event of helping Raven, they lost Conner. Clark could have kicked himself for not letting just Lois help Raven. He had to be the worst father ever! They went to a laughing clown thing that made Raven nervous as Clark thought he heard something.

"Is somebody out there?" A boy's voice called out. "Someone help!"

The three and Krypto then snuck in to see what was going on.

()()()()()

Meanwhile, Lex Luthor was looking around for Conner. He found a blond boy and grabbed him.

"Have you seen a little wooden boy?" Lex asked.

"I don't have to tell you nothing!" The boy shouted.

"'Oh yes you do!'" Lex had Alexander say before he turned to him. "Didn't I tell you I could handle this? 'I was only trying to help.' No you weren't! All you care about is yourself!"

"Could you put me down now?" One of the boys asked.

"'Not until we get some answers!'" Lex had Alexander say. "You're doing it again!"

Lex then heard Conner shout, "This is fun!"

He then dropped the boy and walked towards him as he played pool with the ringleader of Pleasure Island, Jason Todd. Right now, his eyes were covered by a dark green mask, and he was in a gray shirt with black jeans.

"Watch this!" Conner called out as he made a shot.

"Pretty nice." Jason said.

"Well, well, well, what have we here?" Lex asked as he began to walk up. "There you are you little toothpick!"

Lex was about to grab Conner when Jason pushed him back with the pool cube.

"Whoa." Jason said. "Stay back there old man. I'm sorry but adults aren't allowed on Pleasure Island."

"Oh yeah?" Lex asked

"Yeah." Jason said.

"'Oh yeah?'" Lex had Alexander say.

"Yeah." Jason said before he tossed Alexander away.

"What have you done?" Lex called out.

"'Help me!'" He made Alexander say be throwing his voice. "Why don't you pick on someone your own size?"

He then rushed off to where Alexander fell.

"Come on, little buddy!" Lex called out. "Speak to me!"

"Take the nut away." Jason said as two of his men, dressed in black outfits with white skull masks over their faces and a red x on their chests, took Lex away as Jason took Conner to look at the rest of the island.

_Pleasure Island!_

_Pleasure Island!_

_Not an impulse or a whimsy to deny, lad!_

_See that kitten right there? Kick it!_

_See that fence? Break every picket!_

_And you'll never need a wash cloth,_

_Or a brush and comb!_

_Mind your manners?_

_Not in my land!_

_Pleasure Island!_

_Your new home!_

"What's with all these donkeys?" Clark asked as he looked around.

"Let's get you loaded on the boat." A man with dyed green hair said as he and a girl in blond pig tails pulled a donkey to a boat. They were both made up to look like clowns.

At that time, they also saw that the donkeys wore tattered human clothes on them and one brayed.

"Quiet!" The man called out.

"What's happening to me?" The donkey asked.

"Hey Mr. J, this one can still talk!" The girl said.

"We'll run him through the roller coaster one more time after everyone else is finished." Mr. J said with a smile. "He'll definitely be a donkey then."

"Roller coaster?" Clark wondered as he remembered that the coaster seemed to draw the biggest crowd.

"Why are you doing this?" The donkey asked.

"Because all bad little boys make jack-asses outta themselves in the end." The girl said. "Aint that right, puddin'?"

"Right you are, Harley." Mr. J said as he laughed insanely.

"Oh no." Clark said. "We've gotta get Conner out of here!"

They all rushed out.

()()()()()

Conner was running around with his new friends.

"Isn't this great?" Conner called out.

"Yeah, no rules, no parents, and all the candy you can eat!" One of his friends said as they looked at the roller coaster as Jason appeared on it.

_Wouldn't you like an extra scary adventure? (Bwahaha!)_

_Wouldn't you like an extra sort of a thrill? (You bet!)_

_The kind of a ride you scream and holler and clench your eyes real tight! (Clench your eyes real tight.)_

_More scared than you'd admit?_

_Well this, this is it!_

Four children went into a car as Jason pulled a lever and they went in as they screamed, and the car came back empty.

_Pleasure Island!_

_Pleasure Island!_

_Everything you'd ever dreamed you'd get to try, lad!_

_Does it scare ya?_

_Do you fear it?_

_Double dare ya._

_That's the spirit!_

_You're no chicken,_

_Though you may find out it pays to be,_

_As we leave you with a smile and_

_This Pleasure Island memory!_

Conner and his friends got in line as Luthor appeared and approached him.

"There you are!" Luthor said. "You're coming with me!"

They then pushed Luthor back as he tried to push forward.

"Stop pushing!" One of Conner's friends said.

"Oh, alright!" Luthor groaned before he charged again only to be shoved back again.

"Where do you're going?" Jason asked.

"Look, I only want the boy!" Luthor said. "Can't we work something out?"

"This is Pleasure Island, my friend." Jason said with a smirk. "Adults like you aren't welcomed here. Isn't that right?"

Everyone cheered as Luthor shouted for them to be quiet as Clark, Lois, Raven, and Krypto arrived.

"Conner, wait!" Clark called out. "Wait!"

"Stay away from him!" Lois shouted as she pushed Luthor down.

"Hey, you guys didn't want him, so he should be up for grabs!" Luthor shouted back as Krypto barked, and Luthor ran off but not before shouting, "This isn't over Kents!"

As Conner was about to get in with his friends, Clark and Lois ran up.

"Conner, don't!" Clark called out. "Don't get on that roller coaster!"

"I don't have to listen to you!" Conner said bitterly. "This is Pleasure Island!"

"Please Conner." Clark said. "This place isn't safe."

"I heard what you said about me!" Conner said as his eyes narrowed. "That I was a big disappointment! You didn't want me? Well now I don't want you or Mom!"

"Conner, please!" Clark shouted out. "There's no time!"

"He's a parent!" Conner shouted even as a tiny twinge of regret began to develop in him and spread. "There's a parent here!"

Everyone shouted and chanted "Parent, Parent!" As Clark and Lois begged Conner not to get on the roller coaster, but Conner didn't care. Why should he care about what they have to say if they didn't care about him?

As the ride started and the door closed, Conner felt strange. His face grew all hairy and he began braying as he stood up and a tail popped out. Mom, Dad, and Raven were right!

()()()()()

Clark and Lois watched in horror as the doors closed, and they did the only thing they could do. Lois grabbed Raven, and they jumped onto the car with Krypto as it began to enter.

"Stop them!" Jason called out, but it was too late. It was very dark and foggy in there, and the three kept checking themselves to make sure they didn't end up as donkeys too, but Clark guessed you had to actually do the stuff at the other attractions first for that to happen because when they emerged they were all the species they went in as.

"Conner?" Clark asked.

"Sweetie?" Lois asked.

"Can anyone here still speak?" Clark asked as they turned to see a donkey that was dressed in a tattered version of what Conner had worn coming in, and they went to him.

"Conner?" Clark asked.

"Mommy!" Clark cried out in fear. "Daddy!"

Before they could even figure out what to do, a gate closed between them and Conner was pulled away to a boat.

"No!" Clark called out as Jason appeared as smirked as he put his jacket and helmet back on.

_As we leave you, with a mile and,_

_This Pleasure Island… Me… Mor… Y . . ._

He then walked out.

* * *

Oh no! Poor Conner!

Raven: Boo! He's a big meanie!


	9. Reunion

Chapter 9: Reunion

"What does a pair of parents do when their son has been turned into a donkey, loaded on a boat, and taken out to sea?" Clark asked excitedly.

"I don't know." Kara said smiling. She loved this part.

"They buy a boat and row after the boat that's carrying their son with all they've got!" Clark said as Lois tickled her. "I'd figure out what to do about the turned into a donkey part later. I was mowing the sulfur when I sensed we weren't alone. A giant whale was right behind us!"

"Oh no!" Kara called out.

"Oh yes!" Clark said. "Conner jumped overboard to save me, Lois, and Raven, but he was too late! And that's how we ended up inside the whale."

* * *

Clark, Lois, Raven, and Krypto rested in the incredibly large neck of the beast that had swallowed them by the ruins of their boat.

"Shayera," Clark said. "I really messed things up now, huh?"

"We both did." Lois said as she gently held her husband's arm. "If you could give us one more chance, we'd appreciate it."

The whale ate again and more fish spewed in.

"Just great." Lois said. "More fish."

"Mm…" They heard a moan and saw Conner, as he was before he entered the roller coaster, minus his jacket. "I'll save you, Mommy and Daddy."

Clark picked Conner up and set him down next to everyone as Raven scooted away and made sure to have her back turned to Conner.

"Conner, are you okay?" Clark asked as he looked at his soaked son.

"Daddy…" Conner said weakly.

"Oh this is all my fault." Clark said as he took what was left of the sail and wrapped it around Conner.

"Conner, you were a donkey." Lois said. "What the heck happened?"

"I saw all of you get swallowed by the whale." Conner said. "And I knew I had to save you. When I jumped into the water, the donkey part washed away."

Krypto barked happily and nuzzled around Conner to keep him warm.

"I missed you, Krypto." Conner said as he petted the dog. "And… And I missed you too, Mommy, Daddy."

"We missed you too, you brave little boy." Lois said as she hugged him.

"We thought we'd never see you again." Clark said.

"Why'd you try to save me?" Conner asked.

"Because you're our son." Clark said with a smile.

"But I thought you two didn't want me." Conner said. "You were going to tell Shayera I was a big disappointment."

"I was just frustrated." Clark said.

"Because of me." Conner said as he began to tear up. "I tried to be good and do what you told me."

"We know you did, son." Clark said as he and Lois began to tear up too.

"I guess I'll never be a real boy now." Conner said as tears fell down his face.

"This is all our fault." Lois said. "We're so sorry, sweetie."

"I guess we're not as good at being parents as we thought we'd be." Clark said.

_And if we could go back now,_

_And do it again,_

_Think we might this time,_

_Get it right this time._

Conner then walked to both his parents and smiled.

_And… Son…_

_That's the addendum _

_That always should end a pair's name._

_And son,_

"_Who else could laugh as much?_" Clark said as he began to smile and tickled Conner.

"_Having half as much fun?_" Conner said as he laughed.

_As Clark, Lois, and son!_

Conner, Clark, and Lois then hugged. Conner then walked over to Raven.

"Raven, I'm sorry I pushed you." Conner said. "I was just sad about thinking my mom and dad didn't want me."

"Really?" Raven said.

"You can push me back if you want." Conner said.

"No I've got a better idea!" Raven said. "Let's go home and play tag!"

"Cool!" Conner shouted. "What's tag?"

He then looked around.

"Also, how will we get out of here to go home?" Conner asked.

"I don't know." Clark said. "Your mother and I have tried everything but every time the opens his mouth-" Clark stopped as an idea came into his head. "His mouth! Conner come with me!"

"Why?" Conner asked.

"I've got a plan." Clark said.

"Whoo-hoo!" Conner said.

"Okay, I'll hold you up to see if you can tickle the back of the whale's throat-" Clark said.

"And he'll cough us out!" Conner said excitedly.

"Conner, it's rude to interrupt people." Lois said patiently.

"Honey, now's not the time for a manners lesson. Come on up, son." Clark said as he lifted Conner onto his shoulders. "Can you reach it?"

"No!" Conner said. "Wait a second, ask me a question!"

"What?" Clark asked.

"Ask me a question!" Conner said. "Anything!"

"Oh!" Clark said as he remembered the day before last. "What's your name?"

"My name is Woody McWoodhead!" Conner called out and his nose grew about three inches.

"Where'd you get that?" Lois asked.

"The kids at school called me that when I first arrived." Conner said sadly, which gave Clark another idea for a question.

"Did you like it?" Clark asked.

"I loved it!" Conner called out, and his nose grew about a foot as everyone cheered. "Quick, ask me another one!"

"Ask me another!" Conner called out.

"Who's the prettiest girl in Smallville?" Lois called out.

"Raven!" Conner called out, and nothing happened.

"You think I'm pretty?" Raven asked.

"Uh… No." Conner said in a familiar tone Clark remembered from when he was Conner's… physical… age, and his nose grew another foot.

"Well I think Kory's prettier." Conner said, deliberately lying this time to get the last few inches they needed, and his nose finally touched the whale's throat as he moved his head around and the whale began to cough.

"Hold on tight!" Clark called out.

"This is gonna be fun!" Conner called out as his nose returned to normal.

They made it to dry land a lot wetter than when they left it and a lot happier too.

"So you really think I'm prettier than Kory?" Raven asked in awe. "Usually it's the other way around."

"I think she's pretty too, but I like your prettiness better." Conner said.

"Thank you." Raven said.

"You're welcome." Conner said as they walked back to Smallville and Clark and Lois explained what happened yesterday.

* * *

Hooray, they're out and everything's happy again! Right?

Conner: Um… Yes. (His nose grows two feet.)


	10. Since I Gave My Heart Away

Chapter 10: Since I Gave My Heart Away

It took a night of walking before they made it to Smallville, but they took their time, and Clark and Lois showed Conner where Shayera had made Idealia appear and showed them the glade where John Stewart V had attempted magic.

"So," Conner said. "I'll be a toy-maker if you want."

"It's not about what I want." Clark said. "It's about what you want."

"I have an idea to keep both of us happy!" Conner said. "What if I'm a toy-designer? Because I could design the toys, and you could make them."

"I like that idea." Clark said. "You're sure that's what you want?"

"I'm sure." Conner said. "You were really great back there, Dad."

"Hey, I couldn't have done it without you or your mother." Clark said with a smile. "Or Raven and Krypto."

"It was fun." Conner said.

"What?" Lois asked in a squeaky voice.

"Don't worry." Conner said. "I don't wanna do that ever again."

"Me neither." Clark said.

"Me neither." Raven said.

"Me neither." Lois said.

"Arf." Krypto said.

"Hey, my pants are almost dry." Conner said as he felt the wet fabric on his wooden body.

"Yeah, what a time we've had." Lois sighed. "This'd make a great book."

"I can't believe the sun's almost up." Clark said. "You know what Conner? You're the best son a father could ever want."

"And the best son a mother could ever want too." Lois said.

"Even though I'm still made of wood?" Conner asked.

"Son, it doesn't matter what you are on the outside; it's what's inside that counts." Clark said. "And inside, you're made of the biggest heart I've ever seen and enough bravery to jump off a ship and save your family and friends from a whale."

"A whale bigger than the whole town!" Raven called out excitedly.

"Come on, son." Clark said. "I'll race you home."

They rushed to the toy shop as Arella ran up to it and hugged and kissed Raven all over.

"Oh my baby!" Arella cried. "Oh you're okay!" She then became firm. "Never do that again, young lady. You had Mommy worried sick."

"I'm sorry." Raven said. "I was just trying to do my job like Mr. and Mrs. Kent."

"Oh, it's okay." Arella said with a smile. "Just tell me before you go chasing after Conner, so we can all go with you and bring him back."

"I'm never running away again." Conner said. "But I would like to see those places you showed me in the daytime."

"Alright." Clark said. "Tomorrow, we'll take everybody there, but first, let's get at least some sleep."

They went in, and Conner looked at everything and looked at his uncolored sketch of Krypto before everyone looked up and drew back, Lex Luthor was standing there.

"Hey, welcome back." Luthor said.

"Luthor." Clark said. "What do you want?"

"'I think that you have-'" Luthor had his puppet say. "Alexander, I've got this. I think you have something that belongs to me."

"What are you talking about?" Lois asked angrily.

Luthor pulled out a roll of paper and handed it to Clark and Lois.

"What's this?" Clark asked.

"Do you want to tell him, or should I?" Luthor asked.

"It's a contract I signed." Conner said sadly.

"Exactly." Luthor said. "It states that Conner will work for me for the next one hundred years or until he dies. 'Whichever comes first.' I said I had this."

Luthor then put the puppet away.

"This can't be." Clark said as Luthor pulled the contract out of his hand.

"It's signed, sealed, and delivered." Luthor said. "Now hand him over."

"Mommy, Daddy, please don't make me go with him!" Conner cried as he hid behind his parents.

"Don't worry son." Clark said. "You're not going anywhere."

"You can't have our son!" Lois shouted out.

"I have a contract." Luthor said. "He belongs to me."

"Isn't there anything else I can offer you?" Clark asked.

"No!" Luthor said.

"Take anything." Clark said.

"No!" Luthor said again.

"Take everything." Clark said.

"N- Everything?" Luthor asked as Clark sat Luthor down in one of his favorite chairs to relax in.

_You can take my favorite chair._

_Go on take it. I don't care._

_There's no possession I can't spare,_

_Since I gave my heart away._

"I'm sorry Mr. Kent." Luthor tried to explain rationally. "But a contract's a contract."

Lois then stood behind her son and hugged him close to her.

_If we had a bank account,_

_You could take the whole amount._

_Things and riches what are they,_

_Since I gave my heart away?_

They both then had Conner stay close to Arella and Raven as they both walked up to him.

'_Till we felt like this,_

_We could not have understood,_

_Until you give your heart to someone else,_

_You might as well be made of wood._

"Very touching, but I want the boy!" Luthor said as he stood up and made his way to Conner before Clark and Lois stood in his way, and Clark help up the key to the shop, their home.

_So take our home look, here's the key._

_And all the value you might see._

_But never take my son from me._

_That's a price we cannot pay,_

_Since we gave our hearts away._

"This is very nice." Luthor said before he pushed Arella down and grabbed Conner's arm. "But I want the boy!"

"DADDY!" Conner called out. "MOMMY!"

"CONNER!" Both Clark and Lois shouted as they ran after him.

"It was nice doing business with you, Mr. and Mrs. Kent." Luthor said with a smirk.

"Give him back!" Clark and Lois said as they rushed into the street.

"Shayera!" Clark called out as they continued to give chase. "I'm calling you with all my heart like you said! You have to help us! SHAYERA!"

"Hello." Shayera said as she appeared in the sky, and Luthor stopped to stare.

"What on Earth?" Luthor asked.

"Clark and Lois Kent," Shayera said sadly. "I've tried to help you throughout all your journeys and adventures, but you seldom headed my advice. There's nothing I can do now."

"What?" Clark asked. "No, that can't be!"

"He's mine, see?" Luthor laughed. "Even the angel knows it!"

Shayera then shot a bolt of lightning at Luthor's eye that made his yelp.

"Ah, what'd you do that for?" Luthor called out.

"Just because you have a contract doesn't mean I have to like you." Shayera responded.

"Shayera wait!" Clark called out. "If you have one ounce of kindness in you, you'll grant me and Lois one last wish!"

"What would that be?" Shayera asked with a knowing look.

_You see we love him. He's our son._

_And if our lives with him are done,_

_Then finish off what you've begun!_

_Make us wood or stone or clay,_

_Since you took our hearts… Away…_

As this was happening, Conner was trying to struggle against Luthor's grip when Shayera pointed her sword at Conner, and he began to glow brightly, and Luthor let go out of shock.

"What's happening?" Luthor asked. "What are you doing?"

Conner was then spun around several times, and as the light cleared, the joints on Conner's body disappeared, and the wood became flesh. Conner was the gently put down as a real boy. Conner, Clark, and Lois smiled at each other while Shayera smiled on like an aunt.

"A real boy." Luthor said in awe before he realized what that meant. "A real boy? Who's gonna pay to see a real boy? You can't do this to me!"

"Oh yes I can." Shayera said as she shot bolts of lightning out of her sword that Luthor quickly avoided.

"Hey Shay, can I call you Shay, can't we work something out?" Luthor said.

"Nope." Shayera said as she continued firing at Luthor. "Oh, I could do this all day."

Luthor then ran off in fear, rage, and panic. Shayera then turned to Clark and Lois.

"What good would it do to make Conner a real boy if he didn't have real parents to come home to?" Shayera asked.

The two smiled and rushed to their son as Conner ran to them, and they all hugged and kissed each other before gratefully turning to Shayera.

"_There's a lesson learned._" Shayera said.

"_We learned it late but no regrets._" Clark said.

"_The more of your heart you give to someone else,_" Lois began.

"_The fuller that it gets._" Conner finished as Lois smiled and hugged him again with Clark.

Everyone in the town then came out to see what was going on and saw Clark, Lois, and Conner in the street together, and the sight of such a happy family made all of them appreciate their own families all the more. Mrs. Anders picked up both of her daughters and hugged them as they did the same to her. Slade put his hand on Tim's shoulder, and they smiled at each other. John and Dick each clapped their arms around the other's shoulders as they smiled on, and Bruce, Diana, and Terry all smiled at this nice little image. Arella and Raven came out and smiled at the reunited family.

_So take our homes look, here's the key._

_And all the value you might see._

"_But never take my son from me!_" Clark called out as he lifted Conner up.

_That's a price I cannot pay…_

_Since I gave my heart… Away . . ._

Conner then waved at all his friends as Clark, Lois, and Conner entered the shop to rest up a bit.

"Hey Mom, Dad!" Conner said. "After we rest but before we go, I've got this great idea I want to run by you!"

"Tell us now, so we can sleep easier." Clark said.

"Krypto the Superdog as a toy!" Conner said.

"I like it." Clark said.

"Yeah, I'll alter that picture I made to show where the joints could go after we rest." Conner said. "Come on boy! You can sleep in my room!"

Krypto barked happily as he ran upstairs.

* * *

Kara clapped her hands and squealed as she also petted a wooden version of Grandma and Grandpa's dog Krypto with a red cape on him.

"Now," Clark said. "I think it's about time for you to-"

"Mom?" Conner's voice called from downstairs. "Dad?"

"Mommy, Daddy!" Kara called out as she ran out of bed and hugged her parents.

"Hey little lady." Conner said. "How are you?"

"I'm happy." Kara said. "Grandma and Grandpa told me my favorite bedtime story again."

"It was mine too when I was your age." Conner said.

"Now upstairs to bed, Young Lady." Raven said. "We'll talk to you in the morning."

Conner then sat down on the table and sketched a toy he'd designed a few weeks after being made a real boy, a version of his father in a bright blue suit with a red cape and the S-symbol he'd made on his chest. That had been how he'd seen his father after Pleasure Island, and how he would always see him.

"By the way dear," Kara said. "We're going to have another."

Clark and Lois walked down as Conner ran up.

"Mom, Dad, don't tell Kara yet, or she'll never go to sleep tonight, but you're about to be grandparents again." Conner said with a smile.

"Wow." Lois said. "You know, I wouldn't change anything about our lives in the slightest. How about you?"

"Well," Conner said. "I'd have wanted to go see some of those places you went to personally."

The four then laughed and talked as an elderly Krypto and his son, Oddball, walked up to Kara's room and slept on the bed with her while Kara petted both of them.

Outside, the lights for the shop, Clark, Lois, and Son turned off.

* * *

Okay, I love this freaking song! Next up, Dumbo!


End file.
